The Forced Exploration Technique
by Dr Skywalker
Summary: Sheldon realizes he's not the only one suited in the world for Amy.
1. Chapter 1

**The Forced Exploration Technique**

A Big Bang Theory Fan Fiction By Dr Skywalker

Dr Sheldon Cooper lay in his bed awake, thinking of the nights events as they happened. He had a wonderful evening, he'd been on a train ride, he made a new friend, and he kissed Amy Farrah Fowler. It had only been a simple kiss. It was Valentines Day after all and it was expected of him, he was only trying to prove a point. He had gotten cross with her, that she'd deceived him into thinking he could properly enjoy himself on board a magnificant train shed planned. Then she had the audacity to demand some silly trivial useless sentiment as romance?! What nonsense. He was a scientist and had no use for such wastes of time.

And yet…something changed. He'd never kissed her before, not really. It had never occurred to him that he even wanted to, now he couldn't think of anything else. Sheldon knew Amy wanted more physicality to their relationship, but he had only believed it was female silliness. But when they broke apart shed said it was "Nice." It did feel nice. A different kind of nice than sitting in his favorite spot or getting his favorite meal prepared just the way he liked.

It was a new Nice. A nice he wanted more of. He thought of her face, and her lips and her hair. Her face swam into view, and she whispered in his ear. "Oh Sheldon….Sheldon….SHELDON!"

Sheldon blinked and found he was in the Cal Tech cafeteria sitting across Leonard, Raj and Howard. He had no recollection of how he got there, nor did he remember even leaving his bed.

"You okay?" Leonard looked concerned for him.

"What? Who me? Im fine." Sheldon muttered

"Really? Because you haven't spoken in two days." He said. "Is this another one of those times you're in your zone and going to discover a new element?"

Sheldon swallowed. He had no intention of reliving his actual thoughts for fear of ridicule. "Yes. Yes it is." He put his head down and pretended to be in deep thought.

Leonard looked at the other guys with worry. "Not that I'm not enjoying the quiet, but yesterday he didn't even notice when I forgot to put the cereal back in the right order, and before that, someone sneezed like right next to him, he didn't even flinch."

They hadn't even talked about the kiss. Sheldon wasn't even sure he should, he spent the rest of the trip gazing in her eyes, with a longing he'd never felt before, but he tried to act like everything was business as usual. Amy looked up at him with her deep brown eyes. He noticed she had little flecks of green and gold in her eyes, he'd never noticed that before now. It was as if he just discovered her. He heard De Bussy's Clair de Lune whenever he thought of her for some reason, and all he wanted to do was be around her. All he could think about was her face, and her soft skin, and the way she made that little crinkle in her brow when she was angry with him, or the way she pursed her lips when he said something insensitive. He sighed heavily, as if he wasn't allowed to breath for fear of loosing her.

"I say enjoy it while it lasts, don't stir the sleeping beast." Howard said.

Sheldon seemed to be unresponsive to all stimuli. They couldn't imagine what be going on in that mind of his.

"So what do you think about the new Batman/Superman movie?" Howard asked Raj.

"It looks really good. Its supposed to be a tie in to the New Justice League that's coming out, they're going to introduce the Flash and the speed force."

The guys instinctively looked to Sheldon for his opinion, but he didn't he even blink.

Raj looked closely at him with genuine concern. "How long has he been like this?"

"Two days now." Leonard said. "At first, I was enjoying the silence, but now Im starting to get worried."

"Maybe we should take him to someone to get looked at."

"Yeah right, like who?"

"I'd know. There aren't a lot of people in this school who'll want to take him on psychologically..." Leonard said. "Maybe we can ask Amy if she knows someone in the psychology department, she told me Sheldon is like their dream patient because he's so screwed up."

"Oh c'mon its not that serious. He been like this before. Remember when he went a week in deep thought and discovered the agitation properties theorem?" Raj said.

"Yeah that's true." Leonard admitted.

Howard leaned in closer. "He looks….glazed over….like he's…stoned or something." He waved his hand in front of Sheldon's face with no response. "You think he's on drugs?"

"If he is, its certainly not his doing." Leonard said. "He's been like this since you guys got back from wine country. What happened up there? He said he kissed Amy. On the lips."

"Seriously? Dr Germaphobe made out?" Howard grinned and smacked Sheldon on the arm. "Alright Sheldon! Finally getting some!"

Raj scowled. "Great. Even Mr Roboto is getting more action than me."

Sheldon snapped to attention once again. "What? What are we talking about?"

"You and Amy!" Howard leaned in. "C'mon gimme all the freaky details"

Sheldon looked affronted at the thought. "I will do no such thing."

"Sheldon its no big deal, so you guys kissed, it's a perfectly natural thing." Leonard said honestly. He looked at the other guys, and fainted sniffing, and wiping a tear form his eye. "Our little boy is growing up."

The guys laughed.

Sheldon snorted. "Oh please. Yes. Amy and I …." He couldn't finish the sentence. What HAD Amy and him done? There had been an invisible line that been crossed. He wasn't sure when or even how it happened.

"Amy and I…we… shared a moment…but that's between her and I" He looked uncomfortably at the table.

"Oh—ho! Doesn't kiss and tell huh?' Howard said. "Don't worry I'll just find out the gory details from Berny who will hear it from Penny who most assuredly will hear it from Amy if she hasn't already."

"Are you three gossiping Gerdy's finished?" Sheldon said crossing his arms in annoyance.

"Well I for one am very happy for you." Leonard said proudly. It was true, the kiss was big leap for Sheldon, and it meant he really was trying to work on his issues. A wide grin spread over Leonard's face as he thought of all the perks of a Sheldon who wasn't wound so tight. "The basic neurological baser urges that are emitted by pheromones in close proximity to males and females is a perfectly normal reaction." He tried to put in terms Sheldon could understand.

"Man I love those baser urges." Howard murmured. "I honestly have no idea how you lasted as long as you did."

"For your information, the biological urge to engage in physical contact is something I am simply unequipped with. I've never nor will I ever have any desire to …" Sheldon frowned and looked at his cohorts. This stupid kiss was going to ruin everything.

"I think it was a mistake." Sheldon blurted out.

Everyone looked at him. "How?" Howard asked astounded. "Were She'sya bad at it? Earth didn't move for ya huh?" He smirked.

"That's not what I mean, I mean the act itself. I rather think I shattered her world, but now what do I do? She's only going to want more now that she's tasted the forbidden fruit of my luscious lips…." Sheldon said sitting back in his chair pleased with himself. "Poor kid. She's hooked."

"Yeah right Sheldon…you're a sex god." Howard said rolling his eyes.

"Thank You Howard." Sheldon smiled happily. This little ruse was working perfectly.

Raj took a different approach. "Look Sheldon, I think its beautiful. You and Amy are in the most stable relationship Ive ever seen, you both respect each other and you chose the moment you felt was meaningful. "

"Well to be truthful, I … I didn't even plan it, it just sort of happened. You know all my life, Ive been diligently planning and researching and debating the outcomes of the decisions I've made in my life. Everything has a place, as a man of science, I look for the order in things." He said. "This sort of thing is too… erratic. There are too many variables to consider. Its too chaotic for it have any real meaning."

Leonard looked alarmed at this statement.

"Sheldon….think about what you're going to do before you do something you'll regret – or make us regret" Leonard said evenly.

"Its true. The universe is an ordered place, of course the order comes from that chaos, but at the base of every single living organism there is a pattern, and a reason for its existence." Sheldon continued. "Women are far to erratic and irrational for them to have any bearing on anything to do or care about."

"Well if that's true how do you account for the whole of existence doing the nasty since time began?" Howard offered. "The universe is like a woman, my friend, its a messy and beautiful creature, and all you want to do is figure it out, but you cant."

"Maybe you cant." Sheldon smugly countered

"Sheldon, whats your problem? Kissing Amy is a good thing isn't it?"

"No. Its not! It means things are moving in a way I don't want them to."

The guys all looked at each other. "You do like her right?"

"Of course! Im very fond of Amy. Its just that now, as her boyfriend, I have to be …" He looked revolted at the idea in his head. "Affectionate."

"Oh you poor bastard. You mean you actually have a girl who actually can stand you enough to kiss you, and does stuff for you all the time and in return you have to be NICE to her? Oh the humanity!" Howard said

The guys chuckled.

"I have better things to do than cackle with you ladies about the goings on of silly human emotions." With that Sheldon got up and took his tray and scurried form the lunch room.

"Geeze what was that?"

"You think he was that bad at it?" Raj asked

Leonard sighed. "Nope, I think for the first time in Sheldon's life he dosent have the answer to a problem.

Raj and Howard looked at him.

Leonard was always Sheldon's interprtor. He was one of the few people in Sheldons life who understood how his mind worked and could explain it to others.

"ya have to kind of live with Sheldon to undestand where this is coming from but, - he once told me when his father died is when he truly began his life of scientific discovery. Ya wanna know why? Because he shut off all his emotion so he wouldn't feel what it was like to loose someone ever again."

"What are you saying? Isnt it a good thing that Sheldon's finally opening up to Amy?"

"Not when its going to make him break up with her over it." Leonard said grimly.

CHAPTER 2

Sheldon sat in front of his white board in his office, trying despartly to concentrate, but all he could think about was Amy. He shook his head trying to snap out of it. "C'mon Cooper focus! Youre better than this." He said to himself. He stood up and looked at his board. After a series of complicated mathematics, he did a double take for hed written the following equation:

XÙ + A/MY ÖF Cos = Z /Am {y} | 34n/ A- My .

Grunting in frustration he erased and began again. After a few minutes of scribbling complicated equations he looked at his board again.

A = m(y)2, (S) /a| M+| y = 34n /a {m} Y2

He threw his easer down and strode to the door. There was only one thing to do. He needed her, he needed to talk to her, her hear her voice, and to just see her, more than anything hed needed to do in his life.

Sheldon went down to Amy's lab and stopped dead in his tracks. Shed want to know what he was doing there, what was he supposed to say? He needed a plan, he needed a reason. Confound that women she wasn't taking reason away form him! He was acting irrationally! This was riduclius, he wasn't some swooning teenage pop star! He was Dr Sheldon Lee Cooper! He needed to learn how to control himself. He breathed out calmly and gripped the stair well railing. Breathing seemed to help. He could focus now. He had work to do. But as he turned, he smelled something in the air, and his eyes began to droop once more, and a wide grin spread over his face . He found himself standing in her doorway leaning on the door frame.

"Oh snap out of it Cooper!" He barked at himself. "Youre a Texas man! Pull yourself together."


	2. Chapter 2

That night, Leonard went to find Sheldon in his office.

"Sheldon?" He knocked.

"Come in." Sheldon said staring hoplessly at his white board covered in equations.

Leonard noticed the pattern he was making in his algorithums.

"So…you okay?"

"Leonard, I have a problem of a personal nature."

"I know, but its okay. I went through the same thing with Penny."

"Yes but for Penny coitus is like shaking hands. Amy has built the whole thing up in her head so much she's liable to drive herself mad."

Leonard persed his lips at the chibe at Penny, but sighed for Sheldon's fear truly was showing now.

"So what - youre afraid you wont be able to live up to her imagination?"

Sheldon considered this. "Partly I suppose." He said evenly. "My real problem is where to go from here. I mean, we cant just pretend it didn't happen."

"Well, then I guess youll have to move forward."

"But I don't wanna." Sheldon said simply.

"Look - Shes good for you. She makes you … easier to handle." Sheldon looked up at Leonard.

"I was afraid of that. She has changed me hasn't she?"

Leonard nodded his head timidly. "But in a good way." He added. "Youre happier than Ive seen you in a long time, your relaxed more, and your more open than you ever were without her." He said

"Youre right. Im going soft."

"No! NO! Sheldon this is a good thing!" He said standing in front of Sheldon worried hed do something rash. "Look, this is what women do, its what theyre here for. To make us better men."

"This has got to stop. I cant sleep…. I can't think." He began to get frantic. Indeed, change always set him off, but Leonard had prepared himself for this little inevitability.

"Sheldon, you study the big questions of the universe right?"

He was distracted, agitated. "What? Yeah So?"

"Well, in the grand scheme of things, this isn't a big deal at all. " Leonard offered. But upon thinking about it he added, "Actually nothing you bitch about is a big deal when you think about it in those terms."

Sheldon paused. "Ya know what Leonard? Youre right." He said simply. "That's why I can never see her again." Sheldon became serious.

"What? Why?" Leonard said startled. This is NOT what he meant. "I know you like her a lot, and you can't deny it!"

"You said so yourself ! Ive changed. I…I cant eat I cant think, I cant focus! All my work is sloppy, I cant even balance a simple algorthium without thinking of her stupid face!"

Leonard smiled softly. He understood Sheldon. "Its okay to be so scared. This is a big step for you, and change always sets you off. Its only natural when you change youd be nervous about it."

"This isn't a little change Leonard!" Sheldon demanded. "A nebula being created by a black hole is a little change. This is … is… I'm so distracted I cant even think of a proper analogy!"

"Remember when you let Howard be the dungen master and he turned out to be awesome?"

Sheldon smiled fondly. "Yes, that was a wonderful evening. I remember when he made the dragon be Christopher Walken and then Amy and I cast a love spell on each other and…." He cut off scowling. This was getting out of hand. Now he was thinking of her in terms of D&D?!

"NO! I cant do this anymore. Its getting out of my control!" Sheldon began to panic and fret. "Don't you see? I have to end it. Shes….shes …I can't handle this!" He stood up and made for the door. Leonard grabbed his arm.

"Sheldon…Sheldon listen to me. That girl is best thing to ever happen to you. If you walk out that door and break it off with her, it will be the worst mistake of your life! Trust me on this. You have to learn to accept things out of your control Especailly girls!"

"Im sorry Leonard. Shes a tempress, a succubus! An evil witch whose soul purpose it is to keep men from achiving their dreams of becoming Nobel prize winners."

Leonard began to get angry. "Sheldon this is riduclus! Youre just scared of her rejection, so youre rejecting her first! Its textbook! Its pathetic! And its going to ruin both of our lives!" Leonard knew hed have to pick up the shattered remains of what was left of Sheldon's heart. "Now, I know up until now you've resisted the urge of biological attatchment to people but dammit! Man up! " Leonard stood his full height in front of Sheldon. Sheldon stood there bewildered at what had just happened, it wasn't every day Leonard stood up to Sheldon this way. It was true normally hed been in control of his biological need for such frivolity, but now it was all he could think about. And now, there was a different problem. "What I do say to her?"

"You tell her how you feel."

There was a silence. "What if I don't know?" He asked sadly.

"Sheldon, youre the smartest guy I know. You'll figure it out, you always do." He said

Sheldon looked at his friend. Despite all his jibes and condensention, he really loved Leonard like a brother, and trusted his words of encouragment. It didn't stop his mind from eating away at his thoughts, the worst thing was Leonard was right. Amy was the best thing that happened to him, and maybe he was more content with her than without her, and maybe the kiss meant more than hed like to admit. He found himself calming down. After all, it wasn't the end of the world, it was a kiss. A kiss that yes, meant something, he just had no idea what.

Sheldon's eyes began to droop, and a grin blossomed over his face. Leonard had never seen him smile like that before. Hed seen Sheldon happy before, even estalic, and over excted like when he got to meet Jim Lee, or the time he got to ride in the front of the monorail at Disney land. This was something different.


	3. Chapter 3

Amy Farrah Fowler prided herself on her integrity and itellengemce and the fact that Dr Sheldon Cooper was her boyfriend. Hed leaned in and kissed her in a way she never dreamed possible from him. They hadn't talked about it, in fact she hadn't even mentioned the entire rest of their trip. Amy had the good sence to know when to talk about it and when not to. She knew Sheldon had no idea how to process something like that and had long decided to let him come to her if he needed to talk about it.

Both she and Sheldon went on like they always did. But something had stirred in him. Shed noticed a visable change in him. He paid attention to her more, and she found her hand being held on purpose by him, something he only reserved for dark movie houses away from eyes of strangers.

Shed always had this lingering fear he was some how embarressd of her or that he didn't really think that much of her. But then he did the unthikable and kissed her, deeply and with his whole heart. Every time she thought of him, his blue eyes, and dark feathery hair, and his lanky gait, a little twinge came over her, a twinge of genuine happiness. For the first time in her life she actual felt loved by another person, intmatly wanted. Then, suddenly, there he was. Leaning on the door frame gazing at her.

"Hi." He said timidly. He wasn't sure where to put his hands, he had them folded, then he tried ot put them at his sides, and then into his pockets, and then drapped them over the wall as he leaned. Hed never felt to ackward in his life.

Amy smiled softly at him. "Hi." She said back. "What are you doing down here?" She asked trying to sound casual and unaffected.

Sheldon shrugged. "I just thought Id stop by and say hi…" He said still in the door frame.

"Oh. Well. Hi." Amy answered feebly.

"You smell nice. " Sheldon offered. "Like toxic chemicals"

"Thank You. Its formadehyde from the brain I'm dissecting. Im trying to discover the annoylies of nuero pathways projected by negative behaviors."

"Sounds interesting." Sheldon said trying to sound casaul.

Amy's eyebrows popped. Usully Sheldon made some snide pompus remark about how "icky things" she worked on.

"Are you okay? You seem to be … different."

Sheldon finally came in the lab. "Why is everybody saying Im different maybe its all of you who are different."

"Who else is saying youre different?'

"Nobody in particular." Sheldon.

Amy looked at him. Something was up. Even though the kiss was very much on her mind, his mannerisms had piqued her scientific curiosity. "Sheldon… you haven't been sleeping."

It was true, on closer inspection of him, there were dark rings around his eyes.

"You know how you get when you don't get enough sleep." She said matter of factly. She was focused on her work, as she said this and wasn't paying attention to the fact he was staring at her. As she looked up she hadn't realized how close hed gotten to her. "Oh!" She started. "Sheldon…are you okay? Whats gotten into you?"

"Im fine." He said despite his mouth was dry and his palms were clammy.

"No, youre not. Here, sit down. Let me look at you." Amy lead him to a small bench near the wall and began to examine him. "Hmmm… you seem to be running a fever, youre heart rate is elevated."

"Im fine." He repeated. It was now or never, he had to do it, breaking it off with her was the only way to get back to normal. There was only one problem, he couldn't bring himself to actually say the words. He just looked up at her.

"Sheldon maybe you should go home and lay down, you look flushed. I believe youre coming down with a virus." She said. "I obvious diagnosis is sexual arousal, but we can certainly rule that out."

Sheldon. "Well of course we can rule that out. Im not a barbarian." He looked up at her and found there was nothing else in the world he wanted then to do exactly what she told him. He wanted to follow her anywhere. What was happening to him?!

"But Perhaps youre right." He said. "I do feel …. Odd."

"C'mon Ill take you home."

"That's alright. Ill have Leonard take me."

"Are you sure? Id be happy to take you."

"No, its okay. Youre busy."

"Honstly Sheldon, you don't look so good, I think Id better take you home."

"No! I want Leonard to do it. I shouldn't be a burden to you."

Amy looked at him with concern. He was never this considerate. "Stay here, and Ill go get Leonard." She said, sweeping from the room.

Amy discovered Leonard in his lab tapping a pencil in deep thought.

"Leonard…"

Assuming the worst, Leonard sighed heavily. "Hey…are you okay?" He asked softly and sadly.

"Me? Im fine. Its Sheldon…I think hes coming down with something."

"Oh! Uh…good!"

"Good!?"

"I mean oh no." His voice trailed off. "So you guys are okay?"

"Sheldon and I? Yes. Why wouldn't we be?"

"No reason." Leonard smiled inwardly. "So whats the matter with him now?"

"Im not sure, it looks like the flu virus, I think he needs to go home." She said medically. "He looks as though he hasn't been sleeping, and he seems… out of sorts."

"Hes always out of sorts…"

"True, but I still think he needs to lie down for a while." Amy said. "Could you bring him home He was rather insistant that it be you who drive him?"

Leonard breathed easier. "Yeah sure, lemme get my jacket."

"Thank You Leonard youre such a good friend to him."

"Well….somebodys gotta do it." He sighed. "You of all people know how diffucult he can make things."

"I do. Believe me. This isn't like the time he was sure he had the ebola virus because hed been around one of my Chionk Monkees."

Leonard chuckled. "I remember the time he thought he was dying of the black death because he found a liasion on his arm, but it turned out to be ink smudged on his skin from a pen that exploded in his pocket."

Amy snorted, and smiled warmly at the thgouht od Sheldon's reaction to such a thing.

Leonard reguarded Amy. Even though at first encounter hed written her off as a female version of Sheldon, and he at first found her just as annoying insufferable pompus and condenseneding as he was, shed really come into her own. She really cared about him in a way few did, and she was more outgoing , and she had a strange new comfotablty to her. Whereas normally she was akward and unsure, now she was at ease in all situations. Sheldon was good for her too.

"Hes like a little kid – sometimes all he really needs is a nap." Leonard said, then noticing Amy's look he added. "That's what Penny says."

"Well my bestie is usally right about people."

"That she is." Leonard said smiling while thinking about her. He grabbed his jacket and walked with Amy to her lab to fetch Sheldon.

In the car, Sheldon was again silent in deep contemplation.

"So…what'd you guys talk about?"

"Nothing in particular."

"So did you come to your senses about Amy?"

Sheldon didn't respond right away. "Hmmm, that's an interesting phrase – Come to my senses. It would imply that I was out of my senses, and that of course is proposertous."

He seemed to be his old self again. That was reassuring. "My point is, did you tell Amy how you felt about her?"

"There was no need. She knows, theres an unspoken language between us."

"Uh-huh."

"Its true. Amy and I are perfect just the way we are, theres no need to change anything."

"So you chickened out."

"Ah-Yep."


	4. Chapter 4

The following week, Sheldon and the guys were in their perspective spots on the couch, surrounded by everyone as usual.

Raj was on his phone and his eyes widened. "Oh my god you guys ! "

Leonard looked up from his noodles. "Whats up?"

"Theres a classic scifi movie marathon at the Metroplex tommorow! The Day the Earth Stood Still, Them, Attack of the fifty foot woman, A new Hope, Scanners and … oh man original Total Recall! "

Sheldon and the guys perked up. "What time?"

"8 to 8!" Raj said excitledly. "We are so there!"

"Sweet! Lets go to the store for provisions." Leonard bounced up. "Weres my keys?"

Sheldon was on his phone. "If we leave here by 6, we can make there to get seats in the perfect amount of time, provided we don't get any delays like the time we missed Raiders because of those unmentioned." He shot Leonard a accusirtoy glance.

"Sheldon you almost got us hanged, tared and feathered in a public square!"

"A small price to pay for proper justice!"

Leonard shook his head. "Why do I continue to engage you in conversation when I regret it everytime."

"Because my conversation is engaging Leonard. Youre hooked the same way Amy is – I…" He stopped. "Oh no…." He grumbled.

"Whats the matter?"

"Its supposed to be our date night tommrow…" He sighed heavily. She always gets all huffy whenever I explain to her there a million other fun things to do than hang around her."

"Sorry dude." Raj said

"Oh – Im still going…" Sheldon said dismissivly "I just have to think of a clever ruse to tell Amy without her throwing one of her classic little hissy fits. Honestly, sometimes I think she's worst than Leonard. Its like she expects to get her way every time."

Leonard looked at him in annoyence. "I can see how that would be infruitating."

"You have no idea…" Sheldon said ferevently

"Oh I think we all have an idea."

Sheldon perked. "I know…Ill tell her I have to go out of town to hear your mothers lecture!"

"Wait – my mother's lecture?"

"Yes, your mother is giving a lecture on the behavioral disobiendt children and their long suffering parents, which is all stemmed from over indulgence in our society. Fasicinating topic, she references you several times."

"wait - Im the over indulgent child?!" Leonard blurted. "How do you even know about this?!"

"She sent me the paper to read over – I enjoyed it throually." Sheldon looked up at Leonard. "Your moms amazing Leonard. I cant believe you don't appricate her more… the sacrificies she made in order to be able to handle a difficult child such as yourself."

Leonard breathed out heavily. "Me?! Seriously?! What about your mom?!"

Sheldon looked quizzically at his friend. "What about her?"

"You don't think you made her life astoundingly diffuclut growing up?"

Sheldon couldn't be more calm. "Not at all, I was and still am to this day I might add, a delight. My mommy loves me." He said pleased with himself, sitting down to his laptop to video chat with Amy. Leonard just looked at the sky and shook his head.

"Hello Amy." He said fondly. "I have to cancel our date night tommorow, I have to go out of town to attend Beverly Hofstealer's lecture."

Amy looked at him in utter disbelief. "No you don't."

Sheldon looked sideways. "uh…Yes I do…Im leaving in the morning."

"Sheldon, I know for a fact that theres a thermocombusion reaction happening in your trousers as we speak."

Sheldon looked affronted. "Are you insinuating that my pants are on fire?!"

"Yes I am. In fact, I am positive youre lying to me, because Leonard is behind you mouthing that youre lying."

Sheldon wheeled around. "Jewdus!"

Leonard smirked at him. "Go on, Sheldon, tell Amy why you have to cancel datenight."

Defeated, Sheldon slowly wheeled his chair slowly around to face Amy sheepihly. "Well, um….theres a Scifi movie marathon at the Metroplex and …."

"Enough! Sheldon, I already got a confirmation from the Beirage! Its very diffuclut to get a table! Were going to dinner! "

"This isn't fair! We can go to dinner any time we want! Why cant I go?" Sheldon stamped his feet.

"Because you made a prior commintment to me! And you promised to take me out!"

Sheldon grunted. "But I wanna go to the movie marathon, we whined, Cant we go to dinner another day? "

"Don't you even care why its a special day?"

"No not particularly. I mean the anniversary of the Battle of Versailes, in 1254 would normally be cause for celebration, but I don't see why you'd want to make a big deal of it." Sheldon said bewildered

Howard looked at the other guys with an expression of complete disbelive as he looked down at his phone, and showed it to other guys. Leonard winced.

"Uh Sheldon…"

Sheldon waived his hand dismissivly. "Not now Leonard." He turned back to Amy. "Amy I think youre being very unreasonable."

"Sheldon…you might wanna look at this…"

"I said in a minute. Honestly… What a spoiled brat." Sheldon rolled his eyes, leaving Leonard grimacing and folding his arms.

"Fine - please proceed." Leonard said lending his arm out.

"Amy, I can waste time with you anytime, but I never get to go see classic Scifi movies presented on cinimeascope on the big screen with my friends."

"You hang around your friends all the time!"

"Not while watching classic scifi movies presented in original cinemascope."

Amy frowned deeply. "Fine, you want to go with your little friends and ruin my night then go. I don't care anymore." She signed off abruptly

"Oh good that was easy." Sheldon said happily, closing his laptop. "Shall we go to the store now?"

Leonard pinched his eyes. "Sheldon, tommrow is supposed to be kinda a big deal for you guys."

Sheldon looked at Leonard confused. "Why would the anniversily of the Battle of Versaile be a big deal?" He asked quizzicly. "I know Amy is fond of history, but…"

"Think hard. What about that date would cause Amy to think it's a big deal?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "For heaven sake, if youre refereing to the anniversily of the day she and I met youre sorely mistaken. Amy is a women of pure intellect, and she wouldn't be interested in such nonsense and sentiment."

"Really? Because Berny just texted me to tell you to make sure youre going to dinner tommrow and to not make any plans with you." Howard showed him his phone.

Sheldon couldn't believe it. "That's utter hogwash! Why would Bernadette have anything to do with Amy and I's anniversary?"

"That's what chicks do Sheldon, they plan crap like this together."

"Why?" Sheldon asked revolted at the idea of the three girls giggling away planning a tourtuours evening of romantic dinners and silly converstaions about things that wernt important. No one seemed to have any idea.

"We don't know…its one of the great mysteries of the universe.

"I think you should go with Amy Sheldon, she seemed pretty tee'd off"

"But what about the movie marathon?!" Sheldon whinned. "The perverable bros before hoes metaphor comes to mind here, although I have no idea what 19th century farm equipment has to do with Male bonding experiences over women…" He added thoughtfully.

Howard smiled. "At-a-boy Sheldon. Stand up to your woman!" He said proudly. "Show her who wears the pants!"

Sheldon, pleased with the social acceptance of his peers sat straighter in his desk chair. "That's right." He said sternly. "Im the man in the relationship, and I should be able to go and do whatever I want without her catterwaling about it every five seconds." He said getting to his feet.

"Good job Howard. This is going to end awesome." Leonard said annoyed.

Howard smirked. "I just love to watch him crash and burn."

Raj looked at his watch. "Hey are we going to the store or not, we have a marathon to prepare for."

"Shotgun!" Sheldon yelped and dashed out the door.

Leonard. "Why do I bother?"

In the car, Sheldon thought of Amy. There was a nagging sensation in the back of his head, that he couldn't shake. He wasn't even sure what it was. Why would Amy be upset that he blew her off again to go hang out with his friends, after all he did it all the time, and yeah she complained about it but she always got over it. Shed be fine.

Right?


	5. Chapter 5

Penny sat in her apartment with Amy, after just witnessing Sheldon's idiotic defense of wanting to blow off her dinner date to watch movies with the guys.

"I even bought a ridilous whorish dress to get his attention. This is hopeless, maybe he just dosent really like me the same way I do him." She said miserably. Her shoulders shook as she sobbed. "he'd rather be anywhere else than with me..."

"Oh...Am's he defiantly likes you. Maybe he even loves you." Penny shrugged. "I just don't think he really gets how to say that to you."

"His inattention to me dictates a lack of emotional attatchment."

"I don't think so." Penny said knowingly. "I mean he did make out with on the train right?"

"yes. That's true. " Amy admitted. "He has slowly come around since I met him…its just it always seems like he has so much more fun with they guys than when hes with me, it makes me feel like he dosent really like me…"

"I know. Leonard is the same way…but I know Sheldon cares a lot about you Amy…ya know for such a freakin' smart guy he can be a real retard when it comes to girls." Penny said sitting next to her on the couch. "Look, you know Sheldon has no idea he is the way he is." She said. It was weird defending Sheldon to Amy, when Amy was the loyal girlfriend constantly standing up for him, and making exscues for him when anybody got infuritated by his nonsences. "I mean he's... Sheldon for god sake."

"I know." Amy said sadly. "Its just...how I can be sure he really likes me? I mean its so hard to tell with him ya know?"

"trust me, he's more into you then he lets on." Penny said with a triumphant smile. "Even though he acts like he's happier alone and he's thinks he's an island and all that, he also really is happier when you're around."

"You really think so?"

"I know so." Penny said sipping her wine. "I always have gotten the impression you're like ... you're like his thing with all his silly rules. Even though he gets its strange and other people give him crap for it, it makes him feel more comfortable. So like he docent really get why he wants you in his life but he just does." Penny shrugged. "I mean... I can't imagine what he must be like to be in a relationship but you're kinda of weirdo too so it makes sense."

Amy smiled at Penny's attempt at pyschanaltics of Sheldon Cooper. Even though Penny didn't exactly phrase it in the most intelligent way, her little speech did end up making Amy feel better and that was sort of the point.

"You wanna watch a movie and hang out?" Penny asked consolingly

"Sure why not?" Amy answered "What did you have in mind?"

"Say Anything, Pretty in Pink, Bridet Jones, or Steel Magnolis."

"How about all four?" Amy asked "The Guys are having a movie marathon why cant we?"

"That's the spirit! Ill call Beranadette!"

"Penny?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank You for making me feel better. Youre a good friend." Amy said earnestly

"No problem." Penny said smiling. "I know what its like to get blown off for some silly geek marathon of awful movies no one likes."

After a few hours, the girls were very full of wine, and pints of ice cream.

"ya know what…you shouldn't be used to this! Sheldon treats you like crap and you don't deserve it!" Penny said.

"No he dosent, hes sweet and he just …." But now that she thought about it. He did blow her off a lot. And belittled her, and never actually wanted to hang out with her on purpose. But he couldn't help it. He didn't have the understanding of normal social conventions, and he was a genius, he had know idea what she meant by romance half the time. "Its okay."

"No its not okay! " Berny said angrily. "Pennys right! You deserve better! You cant totally do better than Sheldon!"

"Better than Shelodn?! That's not fair, Sheldon is … handsome and intelligent, and when he really likes something, he gets this little dimple in his cheek, he –"

"Amy, hon, -Im going to explain something to you." Penny said trying hard to focus between the fogginess of wine injestion. "Sheldon can be sweet, I know but as boyfriends go….well…."

Amy never considered the fact that there might be another option beside Sheldon, afterall, he was her first… everything. She had naturally assumd he was the one because there was no other option."

"Come on, lets get dolled up and hit the town. Lets show you what a real guys is like!"

Amy looked sadly at the floor. "I cant do that to him. That's not fair. He dosent understand."

Berny considered this. "That's true. You know, Sheldon could very well have a Ashburgers. To him, everything he does is perfectly in tune with the way he assumes its supposed to be. Have you ever considered getting him diagnosed?"

Amy looked at Bernadette. "No, he insisted hes not crazy, his mom had him tested when he was little." She said. "Surly if he had a form of autism, they'd have caught early in his life."

"Maybe we should be on the safe side." Berny said sweetly in her undertone of seriousness. "I mean one can develop behavior abnormailties as they get older, and Sheldon certainly displays behaviors of that of any one of a dozen disorders. Maybe finding the right diaginois will help him get on the right medication regiment and therefore help him function better in social situations."

"Hmm...thats interesting." Amy said thoughtfully. "I don't think hed ever go for it thought. He wont accept there would be anything possibly wrong with him. He denies his ritualistic knocking is symptomatic of obsessive compulsive disorder. Its one of the things I both love and hate about him." She said swalloing another spoonful of ice cream. "Although, he does love to get his head scanned." She added as an afterthought.

"Well when they get back, you should run it by him. If you want, me and Penny will be there to help you."

Amy looked very touched. "You guys would do that for me?' She said almost crying

"Of course sweety."

"Thank You." She said solemly. "If the twelve year me could see me now." She grinned widely.


	6. Chapter 6

Penny marched straight over to Sheldon and Leonards apartment and banged on the door three times the next evening.

"Sheldon! Open up!"

Sheldon came to the door in his pajamas tousled haired and sleepy. "Penny? Are you aware its –" He glanced at his watch "Good Lord 3:09 in the morning?"

"Yes, I am." She slurred. "Youre a big jerk! You blew off Amy and she cried all night because of it! Youre such a self-introduced ass!" She wobbled as she spoke.

Leonard stumbled of bed and hugging himself and rubbing his eyes. "Penny? Are you okay?" He looked up at Sheldon. "What did you do now?"

"Me? Apparently Im a self introduced a-s-s." Sheldon shook his head. "I think what you mean to call me is self involved." Sheldon corrected. "Wait - Amy cried?"

"Yes! You made her cry!" Penny grunted

Sheldon shook his head, and waived his hand airily,. "I don't like it when she gets all weepy… Good night…" He said turning

"Hold it there mister!"

"I told you it was a bad idea to go to the marathon. I thought you were going to apoligize!"

"well, I … I was going to but…." Sheldon stumbled over his words. "Wh-What about wearing the pants in the relationship?"

"That rule goes out the window when they start crying!" Leonard looked at him sternly.

Sheldon looked dreadfully uncomfortable. "Well that certainly wasn't my intention…" Sheldon murmered. "I didn't mean to make her cry… I …"Sheldon rolled his shoulders. "Leonard, I have a strange new feeling and Im not sure what it is. "

"That's called your conscience Sheldon. It means you feel guilty." Leonard and Penny gave him long suffering looks of exhasperation. "Ill put this in terms you can understand - Socail convention states you should apoigize to her and make it right."

"That's right." Penny spat. "You – you march right over there and sorry your say her sorry." She slurred. "Sheldon you have a coping problem …with …. Uh…what was I saying?" She swayed as she spoke.

"Have you considered you have problem with drinking?" Sheldon asked her folding his arms. "Your'e intoxicated quite often." He said thoughtfully. "Perhaps we should conduct an intervention." He said turning to Leonard. Leonard couldn't help but nod in agreement.

Penny frowned. "Lets deal with your problem first." She stumbled out the door.

Leonard skulted after her. "Come on lets get you to bed."

Penny smiled fondly at him. "I don't deserve a great guy like you. Youre the sweetest guy I know."

"Youre wasted." Leonard shook his head

"Yup. Love you!" Penny said grinning happily.

Leonard tucked her in and made sure she got to sleep alright. "Love you too." He said softly as she snored loudly. When he went back into the apartment he found Sheldon in his spot looking very unhappy.

"So what are you going to do about Amy?" He asked Sheldon as he came back across the hall closing the door.

"Well, my father used to always get my mother flowers in the way of red and pink roses in a feeble attempt at apology every time he stepped out on her." Sheldon said frowning. "He used to say 'When it comes to women, gifts are for when youre sorry, flowers are for when youre sorry you got caught, and jewelry is for when youre really mean it."

"So what are You going to do?" Leonard asked sighing dreading the answer

"Im not sure. Im sorry I made her cry, but I'm not at all sorry I had fun this weekend. The movie marathon was very enjoyable. Perhaps I should simply promise to take her with us next time." Sheldon said thoughtfully. "Although my father also said that a woman should know her place." He said "But I always assumed my mother knew where she lived, and therefore that phrase was always moot to me."

Leonard run his hand through his hair. "If theres one thing I know about women, its that even if your not sorry, you say it anyway."

"You mean lie?"

"yes. Lie."

"That wont work. Amy always knows when Im lying. I cant get much past her." Sheldon said thinking fondly of that fact. In truth, he somehow liked she always had his number. It felt good to kept on his toes.

"Well say youre sorry anyways. Trust me on this one." Leonard said.

"Maybe I could invite her to the next lecture your mother has and go for real this time. We do so enjoy each others company your mom and I."

"Im going to back to bed." Leonard said in a long suffering voice.

"Goodnight Leonard." Sheldon said.


	7. Chapter 7

Very early that morning, Amy was awoken by a familiar knock.

Knock knock knock Amy?  
Knock knock knock Amy?

Knock knock knock Amy?

Sheldon stood there in the doorway, with a uncharacteristic hangdog expression on his face.

"What do you want Sheldon?" Amy said grumpily.

Sheldon looked down at his shoes. "It has come to my attention, that last night's evenings events were something of importance to you."

"No kidding…." She said folding her arms

"It has also been brought to my attention that I might have hurt your feelings, such as they are."

"Uh huh…. Keep going."

"And I … I well, I couldn't sleep thinking you were upset with me over something as silly as our first encounters anniversey…" Sheldon said still looking at his shoes. For some reason he couldn't look at her. He didn't like the feeling that hung around his neck, but he wasn't sure what it was.

"Well….Im waiting." Amy said folding her arms in her night gown

"Um..well…I was …thinking of the first time we met, and it occurred to me that it might have been a big deal … for you."

"Sheldon…" Amy said in a stern voice.

"And…I often forget how larger than life I can be and that meeting me for the first time may have been quite the expereice for you."

"No…." Amy said shaking her head.

"And maybe…" Sheldon looked at her finally, into her face and in her eyes. "And maybe the first time I met you, I … I saw something in someone Id never seen before." Sheldon said honestly. "That maybe I met a true equal to myself ." He said finding the feeling around his neck ebbing away. "A true companion I can talk to, and … have possible … small amounts of … affection for."

Amy warmed. She knew it was very hard for him to say sentiments like that, and that it wasn't even an expert from a comic book.

Sheldon rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm sorry I caused you distress." He said slowly. "I cant properly find REM sleep knowing you're upset."

Amy smiled softly up at him. "So do you want to reschedule our dinner?"

"No I –" He thought of Leonards advice. Lie. "Yes Id like that very much." He said through gritted teeth.

Amy smiled and yawned. "Thank You." She yawned again.

"Lets get you back into bed little missy."

"You should get some rest too, you'll be wreck tommrow if you stay up."

Sheldon winced. A chink in his armor. Her insufferable desire for human contact. She held his hand and walked him to the bedroom. Sheldon's heart began to thump fast under his chest and he found his palms got all clammy again.

Amy yawned again and got under the covers. He pulled the covers over her, and before he knew it, he bent down and kissed her on the forehead and she was sound asleep. He stood over her. Her protector, her champion, and couldnt think of what else to do. Leaving plenty of blanket between them, he awkwardly climbed into bed beside her.

He couldn't help but feel a strange new warmth that had nothing to do with the blanket. A funny little smile came over his face and discovered he was completely relaxed in her presence. He didn't feel like he needed a 'spot' here, or that he was in alien territority, he completely felt safe and secure here. It was strange and good. His eyes closed slowly and he drifted off to sleep soundly.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning Sheldon awoke feeling warm and snuggly. He stretched wide and looked around him. Amy was still asleep next to him. He smiled softly as he watched her sleep. Her dark brown hair drapped ever so softly over her face, her arm was dangling over the bed and her mouth was open and she drooled a bit, but he found he didn't care about that.

He slipped out the bed, and went to kitchen to make tea. How courious this new feeling was. He wondered what central neuron processing was causing his brain to be so comfortable here. He didn't know why he liked it, he just did.

Amy breathed slowly , and stretched wide. Mmm…." She grunted and scratched. "Morning." She mumbled as she shuffled out to the kitchen. Her eyes snapped open. "Sh-Sheldon?" She couldn't believe what she was seeing. Sheldon sat at her breakfest nook fixing tea just the way she liked.

"Good Morning." He said brightly.

Amy couldn't believe her eyes, there he was in the morning after sleeping in her bed, and he hadn't made a peep of noise of his discomfort with it! She shoved her specklates on her face to make sure she was seeing this properly. Her heart began to pound in her chest and her hand began to shake. "Are –are you okay…"She gripped the counter top for fear of falling.

"Yes." Sheldon said calmly. He handed her tea, and she drank gratefully.

"Thank You." She said with a quiet little smile on her face.

He sat at her breakfest nook. "Ya know, its customary for a hostess to make her guest welcome by providing food or beverages, but since we already have beverages I suppose food is all that's needed for this to be in accordance with social convention."

Even though she was still trying to come to grips with the fact shed slept through Sheldon sleeping with her, she managed to roll her eyes. "Would you like some oatmeal Sheldon?"

"Yes please." Sheldon said satisfied she was no longer angry with him.

Amy went to the fridge, and then looked over at him. "Why are my eggs arranged in size from smallest to largests?

"Youre welcome."

Amy thought about what Bernadette said last night about diaginsing Sheldon. She decided to test her hypothisis. "Sheldon, would you like bacon?" She knew perfectly well what his answer would be.

"No thank you. Its Monday." Sheldon answered. "Bacon is for consumption on weekends or in a burger which is for consumption on Tuesday."

"Well, what I told you today is Tuesday?"

"But its not. Its Monday." Sheldon answered simply. "Besides its breakfest time, not dinner time."

She looked at him. Oh how shed love to open his brain and see whats kickin around in there. "What do you think would happen if you consumed bacon right now?"

"I think it would be either the weekend or dinner time on a Tuesday from which I would be eating a bacon cheeseburger, but since its it neither the weekend nor Tuesday at diner time, and it is indeed Monday at breakfest time, that means its time for oatmeal."

"hmm….intresting." Amy said. She fixed his oatmeal and set his plate in front of him." She knew well how he liked his oatmeal and made it perfectly without a peep out of him. He didn't even go through his checklist of nessessities for they were all there present and accounted for.

"I must say Amy, I am enjoying this very much. Whenever Leonard makes me oatmeal he always forgets something. Ive never understood how he passes for a physictics at the rate of which he makes mistakes. He totally just wings it."

Amy smiled, pleased that he was so content and comfortable given the circustances, even though he was a jerk.


	9. Chapter 9

Sheldon sat at his white board in the apartment working on a complicated amount of mathematics, scribbling little notations as he went. When Leonard came home he threw his keys in their bowl, and tossed his jacket on his chair. "Hey."

Sheldon looked over his shoulder. "Hi." Sheldon said and continued his work. Leonard looked at the work hed laid out, and stopped realizing Sheldon had been here the entire day.

"You didn't go to work today."

"I know, Amy and I had breakfest, and she was still tired from last night from when we sept together so she stayed home from work as well after she drove me back here she went back to sleep."

Leonards eyebrows popped up. "You – you slept together?"

"Yes. I must say I had my reservations, but it was quite enjoyable. You could take a lesson in oatmeal making from her Leonard."

"Okay when you say 'slept together' you do mean you actual sleep right?"

Sheldon looked at him like he was crazy. "Of course - what else would I mean?"

"Nothing never mind."

Sheldon rolled his eys and snorted. "If youre refering to coitus the answer is most certainly not!" Sheldon said affronted at the very idea. "What do you think I am? Some sort of manicial hooliganistic pervert?"

"Nevermind – forget I said anything." But then Leonard smiled. "So you guys actually slept in the same bed huh?"

"Yes."

Leonard smiled. He was genrally happy Sheldon was becoming so comfortable in Amys presence more. It meant he was maturing and it also made him much easier to deal with.

"Are you going over there again tonight?" Leonard asked hoping to have the apartment to himself for he and Penny.

"No I don't think so. I haven't done anything to upset her and therefore have no reason to go over and apoligize in the middle of the night."

"I see." Leonard said slightly disappointed. But then he thought of a new angle. "Well you should go over there anyway. Ya know, make up for your date night and all."

"Our date night isn't until next Wednesday, despite the fact that's new comic book day." Sheldon said. "I swear sometimes theres no getting through to that girl, no matter how you explain logic. She just wont listen to reason. There has to be a direct corilation between the female's inability to conceptualize logic and the extra chromosome…"He said thoughtfully.

Leonard looked at Sheldon. "Really? Isnt is incredibly annoying when someone is completely unmoveable in their needs?"

"Why yes." Sheldon said "Im glad you see my point." Sheldon said looking up from his board. "I suppose I spoil her too much."

"Yeah..." Leonard said looking at him in a way that he hoped would make him realize why he was so annoying.

"Oh well, whatadya gunna do?"

Leonard sighed. "Yeah…whatareyagunna do?" He clapped Sheldon on the shoulder. Sheldon looked up at him in confusion and shrugged.

"Leonard youre so weird." Sheldon said shaking his head.


	10. Chapter 10

When Wednesday finally came around, Sheldon and Amy found themselves in Tres Bergious, an exclusive resturant in the fancy part of town.

"So my paper is getting published, and Im interviewing in _Scientific American_. I'm going to be the featured speaker in a lecture tour traveling all over the country. It's a pretty big deal." Amy was saying

Sheldon's thoughts were on the new comic books that were coming out today, and not listening to a word Amy was prattleing on about. No doubt some dopey girl stuff from wence he had no intreset in.

"Sheldon! Are you even listening to me?!" Amy said getting angry.

"Yes…" Sheldon lied

"Al right - What did I just say?"

"Ummmm….. Youre monkees are coming along in your study?"

Amy narrowed her eyes. "I knew it! Youre not listening to me" Amy said throwing down her napkin.

"Well look if youre going to get all huffy again, Im sorry youre so boring okay?" Sheldon said rolling his eyes. "Ill buy you some silly flowers or something…sheesh, its lucky for you Im so understanding."

"Oh you are huh?"

"Yes. " Sheldon said matter-of-factly.

"Youre impossible!"

"Well its not my fault nothing you say interesets me." Sheldon said obvoulsy.

"You don't really care abut anything I have to say do you?!" Amys voice began to crack but she held firm. "Sheldon youre ruining the night! AGAIN!"

"Im runining the night?! Youre the one not saying anything important."

Amy swelled in anger. "You know what? Penny and Bernadette are right! This is riduclous! Im sick of getting treated like crap by you and I don't care if you have some diagnosable personality disorder! The cold fact of the matter is you obviously don't like me as much as I like you and Im sick of wasting my time with you! " Amy stood up and grabbed her jacket.

"Really? Youre going to throw one of your little fits here now?" Sheldon sat back in his seat and folded his arms.

Amy grabbed her pocketbook and whirled around. "You know what? Ive had it. Im done! I deserve someone who wont treat me like garbage and who respects me!" Amy raised her voice. "For your information, when a women is angry with you, its not because she's hungry! Its is not because she's got her time of the month, and it most certainly not because she cant keepup with you intelectualy! She is angry with you because you are the most obnoxious, self centered, impossibly arrougant person on the planet! You have no idea what it means to love and you obviously have no interest in me! So Im sick of wasting my time hoping you'll come around!"

"What are you saying?" Sheldon had no idea what had set her off this time.

"Im saying we are through!" Amy took out their relationship agreement out of her purse and tore it in two. "Take your stupid relationship agreement and shove it up your backside! Goodbye Dr Cooper!" and stormed out.

Sheldon sat there at a loss. "What on earth brought that on?' He muttered.


	11. Chapter 11

The ramifucations of what had happened seemed to close around Sheldon as he realized that Amy wasn't coming back. He felt like all the pressure in the room had dropped, and he walked into the apartment stunned and in shock. He wasn't even sure how hed gotten home.

Leonard, Penny and Raj sat in theor prespective places eating takeout. Sheldon came home with a dead hallow expression on his face. Everyone looked up.

"You're home early...even for you." Leonard said

Then they noticed the shocked expression on his face.

"Sheldon?" Penny said "Whats wrong sweety?"

"Amy left me." He couldn't believe it.

Everyone looked at each other, and in unison said "What did you do?"

Sheldon looked baffled. "I don't know… we were having a perfectly nice evening and then she just … snapped and …" Sheldon couldn't finish the sentence. "Penny, I think she's lost her mind, you should have her committed."

Penny looked at Leonard. "yeah….SHES the one we should have committed…." She said putting down her food. "Wait - I thought you guys were good."

"I did too. I cant think of one thing I did to set her off…" Sheldon racked his brain, but came up empty handed.

"Maybe I can go talk to her." Penny said bracingly. "Shell probably take you back if you say your sorry for whatever it is you did."

"But I didn't do anything."

"Yeah, I highly doubt that." Leonard said looking up at the ceiling for solace.

"Sheldon, think hard. Did you say or do anything that someone would consider completely callous or insensitive? Maybe inappropriate?"

"Not that I know of." Sheldonsaid shaking his head. "I can't believe it...shes completely dropped her basket! "

Raj offered his perspective. "Sheldon, whats your alternative? You want to be alone forever like me?'

Sheldon winced. "No. But …"

"Com'on Ill bring you over to Amys to apoligize."

Penny grabbed her car keys. " …but I didn't do anything." Sheldon said evenly. For some reason it was important to keep pointing that out.

"You obviously did something. " Leonard said.

"What if its her fault? Did that occour to anyone?"

Everyone looked at him and shook their heads no. Again in unison they all said. "No. Its your fault"

Amy wasn't crying this time. She was furious. She stormed around her apartment cracking her knuckles. She didn't care how handsome he was or that he was the smartest guy she ever knew. Or how dead sexy he was. She didn't care hes slept in her bed a week before or kissed her before that! Because he didn't feel anything. Nothing! He was a callous jerk, with no emotional connection to anyone or anything. A soulless robot who didn't care about her.

Knock knock knock Amy? His voice was small and subdued.  
Knock knock knock Amy? His voice was fearful and skiddish  
Knock knock knock Amy? His voice was intimidated and unsure.

Amy opened the door. "What?!" She barked.

"I … I …" He looked at her. "I don't understand why your mad, but Im sorry your mad so stop being mad. Perhaps your angry because your hungry. Do you have any of your Luna bars?"

Amy swelled in anger again. "Goodbye Dr Cooper." She made to slam the door.

He threw his arm in the door to stop her from slamming it. "Amy wait... Please don't be like this. I said I was sorry what else do you want?"

"I want you to care about me as much as I do you! But that's never going to happen is it? And Im sick of trying so hard to get you to have feelings for me which are clearly just not there."

"But I do care about you." Sheldon protested.

"Then why don't I believe you?" Amy demanded

Sheldon had no defense. "Please don't leave me." He said after a long moment of silence.

Amy folded her arms and shook her head. "Im sorry Sheldon, Im sick of waiting for you to come around." She said her voice cracking. "Im sorry - but its over. Were through." She didn't slam the door, she closed it slowly and with purpose.

Sheldon stared in disbelief at the door as if it was the door that betrayed him. The world seemed to have lost all gravity. He stumbled outside Amy's building at looked up at her window. From the forth floor, he could see her siolette in the window shade. He sat on the bench nearby completely stunned and numb. What had just happened? How had it happened? Penny, who had been sitting in the car looked up and saw Sheldon who looked like he got sucker punched in the gut.

"Sheldon, sweety what happened?" Even though she knew the answer. Sheldon looked up at her with fear, and pain and utter disbelive in his eyes. "Its over."

"Oh Sheldon, Im so sorry." Penny said sadly. She looked up at the window too. "Poor Amy."

Sheldon looked up at her. "Poor Amy?!'

Penny gave Sheldon a look the way his mother did when she was cross with him. "Sheldon, I love you, but this is your fault. You didn't treat Amy the way girlfriends are supposed to be treated, and a person can be pushed so far." She looked at him with pity, and put her arm around him, and despite his personal aversion to touching allowed her to. "Is there anything I can do make you feel better?" Sheldon looked up at the window with longing but then simply shook his head. "NO. I just wanna go home."

By the time they got back home, Penny had marched him upstairs.

"Now you go to your room, you put your PJs on." Penny said softly. "Youll feel better in the morning."

Sheldon hung his head and obidently went to his room. "Yes, Penny" he said in a small voice.

Raj had gone home, and Leonard looked up from his scientic journal he was reading "Hey howd it go - What happened?" dreading the answer. Sheldon passed him silently and into his room.

"Well, the shammy ship has sunk." Penny said resigningly. "Im going to head back over there, Amy's probably a wreck right now, Im sorry we couldn't hang out tonight." She said kissing him softly. It had dawned on her, she should heed her own advice. "You know how important you are to me right?" Penny said

"Yeah, I know. Whats with you?" He looked at her suspiciously.

"Nothing … I'dknow I just want you to know I think about what you mean to me."

Leonard smiled and hugged her. "Aww, I love you."

"I love you too. Ill see you later. Good Luck with Sheldon."

Leonard sighed heavily, looking over at Sheldon's room, loathing having to deal with the aftermath. "Yeah thanks"


	12. Chapter 12

Penny knocked on Lenoards door later that evening. Leonard answered the door. "Sssshhhh!" I just put got Sheldon to sleep.

" is he?" She asked sympathicly

Leonard shook his head. "Hes a wreck."

"Amy too, she's a mess." Leonard stared at Penny for a long time and suddenly grabbed her and kissed her deeply.

When they broke apart, Penny was stunned. "What was that for?"

Leonard shrugged, "I love you and I want you to know it."

Penny hugged him tight. "I love you to."

"Its weird huh?" Leonard said looking at his shoes. "I really thought if anyone was gunna make it, I thought it was going to them."

"I know what you mean. I cant believe its over between them. I was really rooting for the Shamy."

Leonard smiled sadly. "Im dreading what Sheldons going to be like now."

"Well, maybe hell realize what Amy means to him." Penny said hopefully

"I doubt it. Hes incapable of that kind of epiphany."

Penny sighed.

Poor Sheldon, she thought. Hed come so far and grown so much. Penny noticed the little things about him that had changed. Amy absolutely brought out the best in him. It wasn't even his disposition as much as his small steps toward proper adult behavior and attitudes. The way he let her put her head on his shoulder without shuddering, the way he became considerate of her when she was in the room, the small adjustments to his routine, that for anyone else, would be unbreachable. Amy was the only person in his life, he allowed in his room with no objection, or made small transitions to his schedule. For someone who didn't know Sheldon, they would think nothing of these behaviors, but for Sheldon, these were enormous.

The next few days were as close to a hell as Sheldon could create for Leonard. Everything seemed to set him off, and the guys, while trying to be supportive and bracing, were at their wits end.

"I cant take much more of this." Leonard said with large bags under his eyes. Sheldon kept him up half the night filling out violation forms of his many infractions, one being a window more than 25% open. Another was walking too heavily. Leonard was sure Sheldon was reverting to his worst because of Amy, but that didn't really make him feel better about it. Also, he was forbade to mention her by name lest he get an hour long lecture on the importance to rule adherance.

"Hes going through a break up… cut him some slack." Penny said

"He made me do safety drills all night because he was certain the 'shifty looking' guy outside was going to break in and violate us in our sleep." Leonard said grumpily. The night before that, he was positive a high pitched noise was causing his oxhibital lobe in his brain to shift causing an inner ear disornientation…"

"Ive never seen him this bad." Penny said sadly.

"We have to do something." Raj said equally tired. "Ive tried everything I can think of, but nothing seems to excite him anymore. Hes like….broken dude."

Howard, whom Sheldon had already pushed to the brink, had opted to hang out at his and Bernadetes house until Sheldon realized how insane he was being.

Raj, was very close to doing the same, however being so lonely himself, knew how hard it was for Sheldon, and tried his best to accomidate him despite his irrarional demands.

"I dont want to invoke psylong clause, but I think were very close …."

"I d'know…I think that might make him worse…" Penny said biting her lip.

"Leonard!" Sheldon yelled. "Why are spots on this mirror when you know speficly to keep behind the tape in the bathroom?!" Sheldon demanded from the hallway. Raj and Leonard looked like frightened dear.

"Im sorry Leonard! But this is your third strike, Im afraid your going to have to take my class again!" Sheldon said shaking his head and filling out a violation notice.

"Ok, this is riduclous Sheldon!" Leonard couldn't take it anymore. "Sit down we need to talk."

"After you acknowledge your guilt of this infraction." He said brandishing the notice under Leonards nose.

Leonard huffed and snatched the notice. "Fine I acknowledge youre a nutcase. He said angrily. "Now sit down."

Sheldon sat and looked innocently over at Leonard as if he nothing he ever did was mildly annoying or upsetting.

"Sheldon, look, I know this is all about Amy, and—"

"I have told you before not to mention her name in this apartment." He growled

"Sweety, its clear youre upset, but you cant take it out on everyone" Penny interjected.

Sheldon glared at her. "You are very close to getting banned again…."

"Sheldon dude, no one knows how lonely it can be more than me, and we want to help you, but ya got to knock off all this silly Sheldon-is-crazy crap, or I swear to god one of us or all of us are going to kill you." Raj said

"Im doing nothing wrong. I cant help it if the three of you can follow simple instructions. Being penalized is the only way to get through to you people."

Raj sneered. "Ok, its going to be me who kills you." Raj made a step towards him aggressively, but Leonard threw his arm out to stop him.

"Let me handle him." He said turning to Sheldon. "I understand youre hurting. I know this is your way of coping, but Sheldon, you have to get out and , and get on with your life. You haven't left this apartment in days. Buddy, broken hearts heal I promise and if you just…"

Sheldon threw Leonard an evil look and marched straight to his room and slammed the door.

Leonard sighed. He and Raj looked at each other. Raj shook his head and folded his arms. Penny looked at him reproachfully.

"I know….I got it." He reluctantly got up.

He knocked softly and opened Sheldon's door. "Sheldon? Can I come in?"

"If you must." He said stiffly.

Sheldon sat on his bed looking at a picture hed kept by his bedside of him and Amy the night theyd gone dancing. Even though he didn't want to admit it hed enjoyed her company that night. Shed kissed him for the first time that night. Hed never told her he liked it. Hed never told her a lot of things as it turned out.

"Hey buddy…?"

Sheldon had never looked so lonely and sad in all the time Leonard knew him. It broke his heart to see his friend so miserable.

"Why do all the people I like the best leave me Leonard?"

"Well, that's a hard question to answer right now…" Leonard said not wanting to reveal the true answer that Sheldon was utterly impossibly to deal with at long periods of time.

"She hates me" Sheldon said miserably.

"Shell come around…she's probably just mad now, but I betchya if you give her some time she'll forgive you and take you back…"

"No…she said it herself. I screwed up. Ive lost her… the best girl Ill ever know."

"Well…. Tis better to have loved and-"

"Don't give me platitudes." Sheldon spat abruptly.

"You want some coca?"

Sheldon shook his head

"Tea? Hot cider with a cinnamon stick?"

Sheldon shook his head. Silent.

"Anything I can do to make you feel better?"

"Just leave me alone." He said in a hollow voice.

Leonard didn't answer. He didn't need to. All he said was "Im Sorry Sheldon." And closed the door behind him.

Sheldon was left there all alone looking at Amys picture. He didn't understand where the emotion came care from, but he sat there, and wept silently.


	13. Chapter 13

At the Caltech lunchroom there was only one person who seemed to be topic of conversation.

"Hes competly shattered." Leonard said sadly. "I knew if it ended it would be hard on him, I didn't think it would be this bad."

"No chance of reconsilation?" Raj asked.

Howard shook his head. "Berny said they were consoling Amy for hours last night too. Said Amy's mind is made up."

"Well can you blame her? Sheldon's a nightmare." Leonard said

"Yeah, but I really though if ever there were two people who were going to make it, it was those two ya know?" Howard said

"I know what you mean. It kinda breaks my spirit to think it they cant make it nobody can." Raj said. "I just told Lucy she's everything in the world to me. She didn't text me back..but at least she knows…" He looked miserably at his plate of pasta. "It's a shame that they didn't make it."

Leonard chuckled. "Makes Penny and I appricate each other more though. Its weird, seeing Sheldon and Amy break up made her kinda like me more or something."

"Berny too." Howard agreed. "I guess everyone of us was rooting for them to make it, and when they didn't -"

Everyone looked at the table sadly.

"Im worried about him. He hasn't come out of his room. He wont talk to anyone."

"Maybe we can get him to focus back on his work, ya know, take his mind of Amy and back to the universe." Raj offered

"I tried. Nothing excites him anymore. I tried to get him to go the model train store, he says hes not interested in trains, science, he dosent even want to watch Startrek anymore. Nothing. Its like hes… hollow."

Everyone looked very worried. "You think hell try something … ya know rash?"

"I took away his shoelaces and all the sharp items in the apartment just in case."

"Poor guy, I guess you don't know what you got till its gone." Raj said

"I don't know what to do."

"Look we've all been in a funk over a woman at some point in our life, and hes always helped us, its our job as his friends to snap him out of it."

"No he hasn't." Raj said frowning.

"well, its out job to make sure he dosent kill himself at least. " Howard said. "remember how you were when you thought Lucy crawled out a window to avoid you?" Howard asked "Well we helped you then. '

"yeah you did, Sheldon didn't."

"Well he said he was busy." Howard said. "But he did say he wanted you to be happy didn't he?"

Raj sighed. "Yeah…and..he did suggest that we take you to Vegas when you and Leslie broke up…"

Howard grunted. "Ok…that's true."

"and When I broke up with Penny –"

"You mean when Penny dumped your ass?"

Leonard grimaced. "yes, well he managed to help me out of that…in is own way Sheldon's one of the most loyal friends we ever could have."

The guys looked at him. "Come on guys - he needs us right now." Leonard said worriedly. "I know it dosent seem like it, but he is our friend. Hes our Data, our Flash and our … Sheldon."

It was a strange relationship they all shared with Sheldon, for all his insanity, his bizarre quirks, and his incessant rules, when they looked at his empty seat all three boys missed him terribly. It just wasn't the same without his constant jibes at their successes, or his never ending spewing of useless information about things they didn't care about, or his ridgity with proper table wear usage. When it all came down to it, when he wasn't there they wished he was. Despite all his shortcomings, they knew they all really loved Sheldon because he was such a weirdo, and it bothered them when he wasn't present. As much as a pain in the ass Sheldon was, they all did legititaly care about him even thought he was the most annoying person they knew also.

"Okay com'on lets go over there and try to get him to pull himself together.

"Sheldon …" Leonard open the door and sighed heavily. There was Sheldon sitting on is bed with a heavy five o'clock shadow, dark rings around his eyes, and his hair a mess. It looked like he hadn't slept in days. He was paler than usual, and there were pits in his cheeks.

"How ya doing buddy?" Leonard said trying to feint lightheartedness.

Sheldon looked slowly up at Leonard, but didn't answer.

Howard tried first. "Com'on - snap out of it… You work with vast numbers and universal eqautions, you know there are literally an infinite amount of possibiltes in life. This is just one of them."

"She hates me. I called her 515 times yesterday and texted exactly 2,608 times, and failed to video chat with her exactly 89 times." Sheldon said sadly. "This is worst than the time I made Steven Hawking hate me."

"Well at least she knows youre trying." Raj offered lamely.

"It dosnt matter. Ive lost her forever." Sheldon said in a dead voice. "Theres nothing else that matters in life." Sheldon said hollowly. "I feel like all the usb drives in the world have been wiped clean."

"Sheldon, look, I know you think Amy is the only one for you and maybe that's true, but its no reason to give up on living." Leonard said

"Trust me dude, I know what its like to think youre always going to be alone, and just when you think your never going to find someone again – BAM! The right one walks right into your life."

'That's true!" Howard offered. "Com'on, lets see that Texas cowboy get back on his horse."

Sheldon just shook his head sadly, he was barley listening to them, and turned over so he couldn't look at them. Leonard looked at the other guys in concern.

"You wanna go to the comic book store? That always takes your mind off stuff…" Leonard offered.

Sheldon ignored him.

"How about this Sheldon, me and Howard put your profile on that dating site and you met Amy, why don't we try again so you can meet someone new?"

"Finding someone that I shared that much in common with has a statistical probability close to Googolplexian."

"You know that's not true!" Howard walked around the other side of the bed. "Sheldon youre a physicist! You still have to find the meaning of the universe! Why don't you get out of bed, shower and shave and focus on work huh? it will be good for you!"

Sheldon looked up at Howard as if hed just noticed he were there. "My first love has always been science." He said feeling a bit better, looking up at them.

"That's right, so rekindle your first love." Howard said patting him on the back.

"Don't touch me," Sheldon recoiled.

"Sorry." Howard said.

"After a nice hot shower, and good long algorithum you'll feel like a new man again I promise."

Sheldon looked one last time at Amy's picture, and placed carefully in his memories box, next to his bed.

"Okay." He said, finally climbing out of bed.

"At-a boy." Leonard said relived he was coming around

Sheldon bolted up. "Why are so many people in my room?" Sheldon looked alarmed. Raj and Howard slunk out the door. "Sorry were going. Were going."

"Leonard?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you." He said solemy.

Leonard half smiled. "No problem buddy."

"Leonard?"

"Yeah?" Leonard said half way to leaving. "Can we go to the comic book store?"

Leonard nodded. It relived him he was coming to his old self again.

"Sure." He said from the door frame.

"And the model train store?"

"yeah - no problem."

"and the mall?"

"okay Sheldon whatever you want."

"can we stop for icecream?"

"Fine."

"Leonard?" Sheldon said one last time before going to the bathroom door

"What?" Leonard said sufferingly.

"Where are my shoelaces?"


	14. Chapter 14

At the comic book store, Sheldon moped about and slumped against the wall with his arms folded. He had no desire of engaging anyone, but then something caught his attention, Stewart wasn't there.

"Wheres Stewart?" He asked evenly

Leonard looked over the top of his speckatkles. "Uh…" He dreaded the answer

"Leonard? Where is Stewart?" Sheldon demanded

"How should I know?"

Sheldon's eyes glinted and twitched. "Hes out with her isn't she?" He leaned aggresivly against the counter. Dennis took a step back. "All I know is hes out with that Amy girl for tea."

Leonard looked uncomfortable. It was true since shed broken up with Sheldon, Amy had become the interest of several suiters. Leonard never realized what kind of hold Sheldon had on her. The relationship agreement was iron clad and, it seemed very powerful. It was a strange phenonmina, since she was no longer 'Sheldon's girlfriend' she became more attractive, and desireable. Leonard made a mental note to ask Penny about that, as if it were some strange new female power.

"Bloom just got cut off the Cooper list of friends." He said savagely.

"Sheldon, its not his fault and you know it." Leonard said. "Theres no rule against going out with Amy just because she went out with you. When Penny and I broke up, you hung out with her all the time. You still do."

"Yes, but I happen to uphold a strict law of 'you don't mess with your best friend's girl' whereas Stewart is like a loss puppy dog and Amy is bound to be needy and vulnerable and liable to succum to her base desires out of poor self esteem and questionable judgement impairing consumption of alcohol."

Leonard's eyebrows popped at this "So youre saying if she wasn't my girl, youd go for Penny?"

Sheldon gave Leonard a "Are you serious' look. "For heavens sake Leonard, what do you think I am?"

"I don't know… everyone has a different theory." Echoing something Stewart himself once said

"This is unbelievable" Sheldon said agitated "She's out with that... that...Stewart."

"Calm down Sheldon. Im sure Stewart is being a perfect gentalmen."

"Its not Stewart Im worried about." He said. "I mean, why should I care anyway? She was a friend who's a girl and she is no longer a girl who's a friend? This is a free country..." Sheldon said no fooling anyone. "The tramp."

"Im sorry buddy."

Sheldon was tense and agitated. "I hate this. I feel like she's the dity sock on the floor."

"Well, if Amy want to mess around with Stewart, theres not much you can do to stop her. You guys aren't together anymore, and that's that. I wish it wasn't the case, buddy, I really do, but it is and you need to learn to accept it ad move on." He said gently.

Sheldon scowled at his unrefutable logic.


	15. Chapter 15

When Penny left for work the next morning, she was pleased to see Sheldon out and about again, for even though Amy was her best friend, and she had sworn an oath to take her side, she couldn't help but worry for and feel sorry for Sheldon. Despite her constant annoyence with him, she couldn't help but always forgive him when he made her mad. She wished Amy would come to the same conclusion, but she had to admit, she sure as hell wouldn't want Sheldon as a boyfriend. She wasn't sure how Amy had put up with him as long as she had.

"Hi sweety. How ya doin?" Penny tried to stay cheerful

"Fine." Sheldon said wooden. He couldn't hide the fact he peered around her to check and see if Amy was at Penny's. Penny, of course, picked up on this straight away.

"Shes not here. Shes home."

Sheldon looked down at his shoes, in such a hangdog expression, Penny melted.

"Oh…Sheldon, Im so sorry you guys broke up. I really wish there was something more I could do."

Sheldon instantly perked up. "There is!" Sheldon said. "You could convince her to retract her previous position, and come to her senses." Sheldon said brightly. "Shell listen to you, you being a fellow girl and all."

Penny snorted in the absurdeity of Sheldon's statement. "Sheldon sweety, it dosent work like that. Shes pretty upset."

"But you told her she was being ridiculous she'll belive you. Shes remarkably suseptable to your guidence."

Penny sighed heavily for she knew shed have to explain how this worked. "Ok, Sheldon, when two people break up, and it's the guys fault, the guy has to say hes sorry and make it better."

"I tried…but she so stubborn. She just wont listen to reason."

"Well, she's really hurt. I think if you gave her some time, shell come around. But I gotta go to work, Ill talk to you later." Penny said patting hims on the shoulder. "Swallow your pride, and apoligize for being a jerk."

Sheldons shoulders drooped again. "Theres got to be a better way.

Eight am: Monday

Knock knock knock Penny

Knock knock knock Penny

Knock knock knock Penny

"Right on time." Penny sighed heavily as she looked at the door groaning. "Sheldon sweety please for the love of god. You gotta stop this."

"Pleaasee Penny? You gotta get her to at least talk to me"

"Im sorry sweety I tried, but she gets really upset whenever I bring your name up.  
You gotta learn to let things go. Give her some space and give her time to come to you. Girls need that sometimes."

"Okay." He turned sadly to leave but then whipped around abruptly. "But how long should I wait?"

"Until she comes to you."

"But when will that be?"

"I dknow sweety whenever she does."

"But when is that?'

"I dknow!" Penny said putting her hand to her head in frustration. "And Sheldon what have I told you about waking me up before 11:00?"

"To not to." Sheldon said

"and what time is it?"

He looked at his watch. "11:00 Eastern Stand Time."

"What coast are we on?"

"Well, the West coast. But the interesting thing is that the West coast –" SLAM! Penny was in no mood for his antidote this early.


	16. Chapter 16

Penny and Amy were coming from Pennys apartment when they saw the guys in the hallway a few weeks later Ackward encounters were common these days. Sheldon gave a sad feeble smile to Penny and tried to ignore Amy completely.

"Hi guys." Penny tried to brighten the mood.

"Hey." Leonard said looking at Sheldon with meaning. "Hi Amy. You look nice today." But Leonard's not-so-subtle hints were lost on Sheldon who chose to pretend she wasn't there.

"Thank You Leonard. That was a kind thing to say." Amy answered in her classic rigid monotone voice.

But Sheldon couldn't hold out for long with Leonard nudging him as he did, so he conceded. "Dr Fowler." He said as stiffly as he could.

"Dr. Cooper." Amy answered in turn with an icy frost.

Sheldon turned and walked into his apartment, followed begrudgingly by the guys, Leonard waived feeblity back at the girls who left as well.

Raj looked back at Amy as she and Penny went into the apartment. "Have you guys noticed how good Amy looks lately? Its like she's got a swagger, I never noticed." He grinned with impure thoughts.

Sheldon glared at him. "Don't even think about it Kuthrapoli." He said

"What?" Raj shrugged. "Shes single…Im single."

"Not cool man." Howard looked at him and shook his head. "Raj, Raj Raj what have we done to you to make you want to put us through having to deal with Sheldon if you go out with Amy?"

Leonard too, had noticed something different about Amy lately. Perhaps she had thrown herself into her work as Sheldon had chosen to do, to get her mind off things. Whatever it was, it seemed to be working, she was more confiedent, her shoudlers were so hunched...

"Im just saying I call dibs if no one else does." Raj shrugged.

Sheldon looked dreadfully offened. "You cant called dibs on her! Shes a person!" Sheldon said indignatly. "Besides I called dibs for life as she was mine first."

"Well she's not yours anymore, so I say she's fair game."

"Raj, Com'on don't do that to him…" Leonard looked reproachful . "Not to mention - Well never hear the end of it."

Howard decided on a different approach. "What if we took turns?"

"You have a wife!" Raj protested "No taksey backseys."

"First of all, not a one of you is worthy of Amy. Im the only one who can possibly register on her intellectual scale, compared to me, you're the lowely surfs pining over the fair maiden."

"What does that make you?"

'The court jester…." Howard muttered

They all laughed at him

"I – No…." Sheldon grumbled. "I am her nobel knight, standing at the ready to win her hand … back."

Leonard found this very amusing. "And prey -how brave knight doth thou propose that ye do that?"

Sheldon looked very pleased with himself. "Im simply going to develop an equation that deciferes the female mind." He said simply

The guys stared at him.

"I hypothisize that I can discover what makes females so irrational, and therefore when I discover why they act so illogically I can simply explain my theory to Amy and shell realize that Im right, and take me back."

"Uh –huh…" Leonard said folding his arms. "I cant tell if that's the smartest thing Ive ever heard you say or the dumbest."

Howard looked at Leonard, "you know there might be something to this…."

"Howard!" Leonard said indignatly "Do you honestly believe SHELDON COOOPER is going to figure out the female mind?"

"If he does well be millionares! Every geek, looser and nerd on the planet will be paying money hand over fist just for a glimpse."

"This is absurd! Sheldon if you want Amy back just talk to her!"

Sheldon shook his head. "That wont work. Unfortaunly Amy is inexplicably stubborn, the poor thing., shackled to her own feminae mental weaknesses. So, even though it pains me to do so, I have to use science against her."

"Yeah good Luck with that!" Leonard said rolling his eyes

"Upb upb up Leonard, don't discourage him….if he pulls this off it could solve the worlds problems." Howard said

"Thank You Howard." Sheldon said with dignity


	17. Chapter 17

Knock knock knock Amy  
Knock knock knock Amy  
Knock knock knock Amy

"Go away Sheldon!" Amy yelled I don't want to hear any more reasons why youre so great and I should take you back!"

Sheldon stood at her door like a dog wanting to come in. "Amy please open the door." He said quietly.

"NO! GO away!"

"Com'on Amy I said I was sorry!" Sheldon whined

"That's not good enough anymore!" Amy yelled through the door. "Im sick of your empty apoliges!"

"Come now! Amy youre being unreasonable!" Sheldon said getting angry. "Theres no reason you should still be cross with me!"

The door threw open. "Really?! How about the fact youre driving everyone crazy! Because again youre the most self involved pig headed stubborn selfish person on the planet! Now Im asking you for the last time! Get out of my hallway out of my building and out of my life!"

"But Amy…." Sheldon pleaded.

" ' . . !" Amy growled. The door slammed.

Sheldons shoulders fell.

He slowly turned unable to compherend what on earth was wrong with her that she wouldn't take him back.

"The mailman was right. Bitches are crazy."


	18. Chapter 18

Since Sheldon was so broken up over it, Leonard decided to see if he could take matters in his own hands, and headed over Amy's lab on the far side of the biology department.

"Hey…" Leonard knocked gingerly. "Amy? Can I talk to you?"

Amy snorted deservedly. "Sent his lapdog did he?"

Leonard took offesnse. "Lapdog?" He said begruginly

"What is it Leonard? Im busy" she said shortly

It didn't escape Leonard's attention Amy's eyes were puffy and red. He forgot this was hard on her too.

"Look, you have to take Sheldon back. Hes driving everybody crazy because he cant handle loosing you."

Amy gave him a 'why is that my problem' sort of look.

"Hes not sleeping, his work is suffering... were suffering. I think hes snapped!"

Amy considered whether Leonard would lie about such a thing. "What do you want me to do about it?" Amy said not budging. "I can't cure crazy!"

"You know hes …. Fragile. " Leonard said. "He cant handle it when things change like this. He cant function properly. " He paused. "He misses you."

Even though this news broke Amy's heart to hear she remained steely eyed. "No. ya know what? My entire life Ive gotten crapped on by the people I thought were my friends, and I did nothing to deserve it! Im sick of being a doormat! Im sick of being treated like I don't exist or that I don't matter to anyone! I deserve t be loved and appreciated!"

"He does appreciate you, ...in his own way." Leonard lamented. "Amy, look," Leonard said sighed heavily. "Sheldon is... I mean hes...he doesn't know how to process those sorts of things. But I know he cares about you. A lot. He just docent know how to show it in what other people would consider the 'normal' way."

Amy pursed her lips trying to remain hard on the subject. "Im sorry Leonard, but until he proves that to me, I have no choice. Im not going to take his nonsense anymore." She said. "and frankly, neither should you." Amy said putting her scaple down. "Its not for you or me to do his bidding every five seconds. Hes thiry three years old not five!"

Leonard chose to ignore this little statement of blunt truth. "He didn't send me here. He dosent even know Im here."

Amy bit the inside of her lip. "You really do care about him don't you?"

"Of course. Hes my best friend" Leonard admitted. "I know hes a jerk, and annoying, and out of his mind, but hes also the best person I know. " He said giving Amy a look. "Sheldon is loyal to a fault. He docent know how to let people go out of his life. He's devastated to loose you." Leonard said. "Youre the best thing to ever happen to him, and its driving him nuts thinking of life without you." He looked down at the polished lab table. "Lord knows he dosent make anything easy, and I know he can be the most rage inducing self involved egomanicial pyschotical brat you'd ever meet, but also … well…" Leonard couldn't think how to figure out the end of that sentence. He shrugged "Well, Penny says it better, she says despite his craziness, Sheldon has a lot of love to give, he just dosnent really understand those emotions.

"I know. I know deep down he really cares." She said. "But why I should I have to placate to his every whim because he's so broken." She demanded. Leonard saw she had a valid point. "It never occurs to him that Im broken too! You don't think I have love to give? You don't think I have issues with affection and emotion?"

Leonard sighed heavily. "We all do. I think that's why we all get along so well. Were all broken, and if you think about it, as scientist, the most logical circumstance we can come to, is resolving those problems, with the people who help us cope, and function."

"I understand what youre saying, I really do, but if I take him back without a legitamate apology form him, it will just prove to him that his negative behavior will have no consquences."

"So youre delibratly not taking him back to teach him a lesson?"

"No of course not, Im just sick of getting pushed around."

Leonard considered this, and realized Amy was 100% right. Sheldon had to understand why she was angry and upset with him, because he really didn't get it. He thought she was just being mean to him for no reason because to Sheldon, his behavior was perfectly fine.

"Your right Amy. He has to come to you." He said slowly. "Sorry to bother you, Ill let…Ill let you get back to work."

"Leonard?"

"yeah?" He said turning.

"Is … is he really that bad?"

"Hes a disaster." Leonard admitted. "Wolowitz tried to poison his Tai food the other day before Raj stopped him.

Leonard sat down on the stool oppiste to her. He tried to properly explain Sheldon, which wasn't easy. "For Sheldon, its not about the grand gestures that the rest of us think prove our love. It's the little nuancsed things. When he accepts half a sandwich from you, or when he lets you sit on his bed. The littlest things which anyone else would consider completely meaningless are the things that Sheldon thinks are extremely intimate or declarations of love. Like when he used your name as his password. " Leonard offered. Amy tried to fight back tears as hard as she could.

"Trust me when I say, there is not another person on the planet Sheldon would let into his life as he has let you. Ive never seen him so … balanced as when hes with you." Leonard said carefully. "And now that he dosent have you…hes well …lets just say unbalanced."

Amy wiped her eyes with her hankercheif.

"Really?"

"Are you kidding me?" Leonard said "hes a frickin' mess." Leonard ran his hand through his hair. "I know you're seeing Stewart and thats great, but ya know...if you could find it in your heart to forgive Sheldon it would make everyones else life a lot easier."


	19. Chapter 19

Amy and Stewart sat across from each other in a darling little tea shop on the other end of town. Amy sat there trying very much to enjoy herself. She was so pleased and flattered when Stewart had asked her out, she couldn't refuse him, despite the fact that dating up until very recently had been reserved for Wednesday and the third Thursday of every month.

She found the new found freedom of being able to do whatever she wanted very enjoyable, but somehow she wasn't happy.

"Do you like your tea?" Stewart asked nervously

"Oh yes, Im very fond of tea." Her heart ached as she thgouht of the tea she and Sheldon used to drink together. She rememebered the made up langauge they invented together, and the trvia games they played. Try as she might she couldn't forget him, and sighed heavily.

"Stewart?" Amy asked. "_Has Sheldon said anything to you since we broke up?"_ is what she wanted to say, but she felt it would be in poor taste to say it out loud.

"yeah?"

"Do you like running a comic book store?"

"Well, I don't do it for the money. I do it because comics are something Im passionate about." He said shrugging trying to not sound like the loser he thought he sounded like. "What about you?" He said sipping his tea. "What are you passionate about?"

"Well, science I guess, and language, literature, I really like music as well." She said

"Oh yeah? Whats your favorite book?"

"Pride and Preudice." She said without thinking.

"That's cool, Ive never read it but I hear its like a masterpiece."

"It is." Amy said fondly. "What about you? Whos your favorite artist?"

"Well, hmm…my favorite? That's really hard…Id have to narrow it to like categories – like my favorite fuavist is Matise but my favorite street art is Banksy."

"Oh Wow, me too!" Amy said happily. "I saw Exist through the giftshop like a hundred times."

"Cool! Maybe we could to the Getty sometime and see some of his prints."

"Id like that." Amy said evenly. Her face fell, for some reason all she could think about was Sheldon. "Sheldon once promised to take me to the MOCCA but we never ended up going, because there was a comiccon that weekend." Amy found a bite in her voice.

"Huh." Stewart said reading her face. "Oh. Ya mean the one in the Grove?"

"yes. But I imagine you must go to those things all the time."

"Are you kidding?! I freakin hate Comic Cons! Surrounded by comics, and drooling fan boys all day everyday is already my life, why I would I subject myself to the soul crushing defeat of being rejected by those who are doing better at it that me in a huge arena?"

Amy smiled sadly. "Why don't you purseue your art more?" She asked. "I hear youre really good."

"Im not that good." Stewart said bashfully

"Penny said you drew a portrait of her in like five seconds, thats pretty impressive."

"You don't think my work is …uh … how did he put it…juvenile and unessessarcy?"

"Oh." Amy knew exactly who Stewart was referring to. "Well … he can be a huge jerk when it comes to peoples feelings." Amy said coldly. "He has no idea what it means to appriciate someone." She said with an air of bitterness. Amy looked at Stewart who looked back at her with nervous low self esteem. "I would love to see your work Stewart." She said. "I bet you're even better than Penny says."

Stewart smiled . "Thanks." He said. "So uh…what are you working on lately?"

"Well actually I just been chosen for a lecture tour on behalf of Scientific American for my recent paper." She said

"Wow…that's impressive!" Stewart said sinking a bit in his seat after realizing that Amy's achievment hrew into sharp relief the lack of his.

"So uh…how are you doing with the break up and all…?"

Amy frowned in remeberence,."He can remember the exact nuetrinos in a didactic formula, recite the entire periodic table of elements, and find evedence to suggest the origin of the universe, but can he remember our anniversity? No! He thinks no work is as important as his, like he owns the entire field of sciencetific discovery to himself because he thinks hes smartest guy in the room."

"um…Amy are … are you ... are you still hung up on Sheldon, because we can call it a night if you want…." Stewart said uncomfortably. "I mean... I get it..."

"Me? No. No - Im Im fine." She said dismisivly

"You sure?, because you seem…distracted." Stewart said. "You look the same way he does when you sit in his spot, or move his comic books, or touch his food."

"Well, I cant say Im over him exactly, but I have moved on." She said trying very hard to sound convincing.

Stewart smiled relived. "So…uh…how about we change the subject?"

"Good Idea" Amy said happily. "So has Sheldon mentined me at all since you've seen him?"

Stewart wanted absolutely nothing to do with the topic, but he relented out of pathetic honesty. "Uh, yeah, he …hes mentioned a few times." Stewart sighed. This was never going to work.

"What did he say?"

Stewart rubbed his neck. "Well, …." He said uncomfortably. "I think hes taking the break up pretty hard to be honest." He said trying not to look at her in the eye.

Amy looked sadly at him. "Is he okay?"

"I think hell be okay. Just needs time ya know?"

"yeah…." She said slowly. Why was this so hard? Why couldn't she stay angry at him for ignoring her all the time and constantly making her feel like she didn't mater to him.

"Amy?" Stewart asked

"Yes?"

"Do you still love Sheldon?"

"L-Love?" Amy sputtered her tea. "I…I .." She stopped. The words had never occurred to her. That's sort of sentiment wasn't something ever considered with Sheldon Lee Cooper. But now that Stewart said it, it was obvious. Of course she loved him. Amy smiled gently. "I think I do."

Stewart nodded in acknowledgment. "I know. Its okay." Stewart said sadly. "When I see you guys together, I can tell hes crazy about you."

"Yeah right..."

"No its true. Ive known Sheldon for a long time, and I would never have thought someone could have such an impact on him like you have."

"Really?" Amy said surprised "How can you tell?"

"Seriuosly?" Stewart asked "The way he makes changes for you and no one else, the way he looks at you, everything. I wish I had that with someone." He said miserably

"I wish this was easier." Amy said miserably

"Me too." Stewart said sadly but for a completely different reason

Amy felt awful. Here she was, out with Stewart a great guy, sweet funny, charming and talented and all she could think about was dumb old Sheldon.

"If you want to call it a night, I understand." Stewart said hating himself.

"No, it would be wrong to spoil the evening. How about we go to a movie?"

"Really?" Stewart brightened.

"Sure, my treat."

Stewart smiled. "Thanks!" He shrugged. Inwardly very relived, he was broke, and barley had the money to cover the tea.


	20. Chapter 20

After the movie, Amy and Stewart walked through the lobby when Amy saw an old high school classmate of hers. She was tall and beautfuil, and walked with an air of complete confedeince and prestige form a life of abundant wealth and privelage. She had also tortured Amy during her formative years.

"Hi Lamely Amy!" She said smiling. "Oh my God! Its been ages. How are you?" She said throwing her hair bak and adjusting her Micheal Kors purse.

"Im well thank you." Amy said. She remembered with great detail the meanness of Catherine when they were in high school.

"Oh my god! You look amazing! Are you coming to the high school reunion next month?" She said excitedly.

"Um…I receieved an invite but Im not sure I wanna go." Amy loked at her strangly. She had no intention of revisiting the people who made all gour years of her high school career miserable. She also assumed no one would want her there. Time, it seemed matured a lot of the people who were mean to her. Catherine stood there beaming at her, when twenty five years ago, she sneered and cracked evil spirited jokes about her.

"Are you serious? You have to!" Catherine demanded and then looked at Stewart. "We were like best friends in high school." She explained.

Amy frowned. She remembered their relationship Much differently.

"So, What are you doing now?"

"Im one of the lead researchers at Cal tech for Neurology"

"Wow! That's great" She said interested. "I got married a couple years ago. My son just turned 4." She said. "Do you have kids?"

"Me?!" Amy was flabbergasted at the thought. "No Im way too buy for children."

"Is this your boyfriend?"

"No. - This is my friend Stewart. Stewart Bloom, this is Catherine Collins. "

Stewarts eyes widened as he took in Catherine Collins. She had bright auburn hair, green glasses, and a smart business suit on. She looked up at Stewart and smiled.

"Hi. Im Stewart." He said extending his sweaty hand.

"Hi Stewart." Cathrine smiled and blushed. "What do you do?"

"I uh…own a store…the Comics Center over on East Green St."

"Oh my god, you own a comic store?"

"Yeah, I know, its kinda lame." He said ashamed of himself for being such a loser.

"No Way! My brother goes into that store all the time! You own that store?! That's awesome!"

"Wait…youre brother?" Stewart looked confused. He knew all his clientele very well, after all there only a handful of people who came in reguraly, but now that he looked at her he blurted out "Captain Underpants is your brother?!"

"Yes unfortuanly." She said smiling and looking at the sky. "We prefer to call him Joesph."

"Wow, I had no idea he had such a charming and beatuful sister." Stewart had no idea where the words came form he never spoke like that girls. "So uh…what do you do?"

"Oh, Im uh… a Graphic Designer for Pentagram Studios." For some reason she sounded just as ashamed as Stewart did.

"That's really amesome. You do like websites and stuff?"

"Well, yeah. I uh, actually worked on the website for DC." She said rolling her eyes hating how lame that sounded.

Stewarts jaw dropped. "That's like the coolest thing Ive ever heard. Are you in to comics?"

"Yeah, Im actually a closet fan girl. " She shrugged. "I just recently went to the San Diego Comic Con with my brother and we met Alan Moore."

"That's….the most amazing thing Ive heard." Stewart said transfixed

She giggled. "You are so cute." She said twirling her hair a bit. "Do you uh…want to grab a bite with me?"

"Well I could eat ….oh uh…"

Stewart looked at Amy awkwardly but Amy grinned. For the first time in her life she was glad she was being ignored by people cooler than her. It felt nice to see Stewart happy and to have had something to do with it. "Its fine Stewart. You should go. I"

"Really?" Stewart said smiling from ear to ear.

"Have fun." She said smiling

"Talk to you later Amy! Well catch up at the reunion!" She called over her shoulder.

" Thank You so Much! Youre the best Amy. He hugged her and bade her goodnight to go off with Catherine, and she walked home.


	21. Chapter 21

Amy pulled her keys out to open her door when she got home, and found Sheldon sitting under her door.

"What are you doing here?"

"You were out with Stewart wernt you?" He accused her

Amy stood indignatly. "What if I was?" Amy said coyly. "Whats it to you?"

Sheldon was unrelented. "Amy, were no longer a couple, and youre free to go out with any one you like, I cant stop you from having a good time with a gentlemen caller." He said remorselessly. He couldn't help but sound judgemental.

Sheldon stood up and wasn't sure what to do now.

"Its none of your business." She said opening the door. "You didn't answer my question." Amy said folding her arms. "What are you doing here Sheldon?"

When asked directly, usually Sheldon had an answer for everything. It had just occurred to him, he had no idea why he was here, only that he wanted to be near her for some reason…that didn't seem like a good reason.

Sheldon cleared his throat. "Im here, to…um…" He thought fast. "Collect my property." He said triumphantly. "You possess my Flash flash drive, one batman t shirt blue, one justice leauge t shirt, red, - two pairs of socks arigile, one Metal Men comic book, issue 37, my box set of Dr Who, one original novelisation of starwars episode four, my set of various hexagonigal Barry Allen wrenches, my green lantern power ring, my super string theormy text book, a perpetual motion dark matter detection equipment, my spyglass, three pairs of Khaki Trousers, my model of the milenium falcon, my copy of the portrait of dorian grey, … and my amazing spiderman towel." He ratteled off.

Amy looked at him with remorse. It really was over. It was hard to accept for her that he didn't want her back or even wanted to be in her life. She sighed and shook her head. "Fine." She opened the door to her apartment and tossed her keys on the nearby table. She looked about for a box for Sheldon's things and found it diffucult to locate one. It was amazing how many of his things had made there way over to her place given Sheldon's penchant for meticuleness. She looked sadly at her bedside table, with the picture of the two of them smiling happily at the camera. That was the weekend they had attented a symposium on Uetrium. She found his power ring on her dresser, next to his small stack of comics, hed let her read.

She decided to toss everything in a shopping bag, after shed managed to track down all of Sheldon's things, she passed her jewelry box, and the tiara hed given to her.

He was standing in her door way just… gazing at her.

"Im sorry, Ill hurry." She said assuming he was getting impatient.

"No." Sheldon said softly. "You also have one more thing that I gave to you." He said scratching the top of his hand.

"Whats that?" She said absent mindedly looking about for his things

"I know its an old fashioned notion, and that Ive never been one to endulge in such petty social convention, and perhaps it dosent even mean anything anymore…."

"uh-huh" Amy was looking around for his comic book distracted.

"Its just that, its something I gave to you that while holding no real intrinsic value on any kind of market, to me its infinataely valuable."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah, what is it - your Darth Vader helmet? that's not here, Koothrapali has that. You left it there when you were having some sort of space war thing…"

"What? No. I was talking about my heart."

Amy stopped dead, and wheeled around. "What did you just say?"

"I said, I gave you my heart, and Im very unhappy with how you've treated it so far."

Amy's breath caught in her chest. "Sheldon….I …" She had no idea what to say to him, shed never heard him express himself this way, let alone say it with such candor.

"Do you care for me Sheldon?" She said finally

Sheldon took a step closer to her. "Of course I do. Isnt that what Ive been trying to say this whole time?" He said exhasperted. "For heavens sake do you have any idea that I - ?" He stammered. "What I …I mean is…." He stood there troubled, and unable to finish his sentence. Sheldon Cooper, a man who literally had a lobg winded explaination for anything, who went on and on about any manner of subjects found he was speechless. Hse had that effect on him,

Amy smiled. She stepped toward him and tossed the bag of stuff on the nearby chair, and looked up at him.

"Sheldon…" She stood there wanting despartly to throw her arms around him and hold him tight but she knew better than to do so with him.

They both stood there close to each other, but not touching. She wanted him to kiss her so badly, but all he did was stand there awkwardly. "Ill uh…come back for my stuff another night, youre busy." He said finally.

"If you want, you can keep your stuff here, ya know…I mean its a lot of stuff to carry all at once, and … I don't mind." She said looking at the floor.

Sheldon's eyes brightened and he swallowed hard. He simply looked in her eyes, and found he didn't want to move from the spot he was in.

"Very well, Im glad we got that settled Dr Fowler." Sheldon said clearing his throat. Snapping back to reality. "Goodnight, have a pleasant evening." He said bowing his head and shut the door.

"Goodnight Dr Cooper." She said after him.

Amy stood therewith a strange little smile on her face. Try as she might she just couldn't stay mad at the big lug.


	22. Chapter 22

After a few days, Penny and Leonard were heading up the stairs to her apartment when she saw a tall muscular guy in the hallway who looked remarkably familar.

"Holy crap…has Sheldon been working out?" Penny said unable to believe it. The guy turned, and with the exception of his fathers eyes, and mothers chin, he looked exactly like Sheldon. A cool, muscular version of Sheldon with great hair. "Sh-Sheldon?" She asked confused.

"No no no…Sheldon's m' little brother, I'm George." Penny found herself staring at him with very impure thoughts going through her head. "Wow…" He breath caught in her chest. "um…Pleased to meet you…." She held out her hand and he kissed it. She giggled. Leonard frowned. He held his hand to be shaken. "George Cooper Jr." Leonard winced in pain as he let go of his hand. "You must be Little Leonard."

Penny giggled. 'Little Leonard! … That's really funny." Leonard shot her a dirty look and she instantly stopped laughing .

"Youre here for Sheldon Im assuming?" Leonard said in annoyed tone.

"Uh…yeah." He said in his Texas Accent. Do you know which apartment hes in?"

"yeah, its right here."

"Oh! That's right, you guys live together. "

"More like tolerate each other for mutual benefit."

"Yeah, heh… Shelly can be a handful."

Leonand sighed heavily. "Yes. He can .

"So uh… how is he doin'?" He became serious. "We haven't spoken in…a while." George asked tentavely.

Leonard tossed his keys in the dish by the door, and Sheldon was in his usual spot on the couch. When he looked up Sheldon instantly bristled. "What is HE doing here?!" Sheldon was on his feet irate.

"I have no idea, I just found him in the hallway." Leonard said defensivly with his hands up in defeat.

"Why are you here?" Sheldon demanded.

"Nice to see you too Shelly!" George said. "Well I was in LA signing deevorse papers, and well… mom called - said I should swing by on account we aint seen each other in years"

"Of course mom would send her attack dog on me…" Sheldon scowled

"Oh com'on Shelly…don't be like that. Shoot - we aint spoke in mor'in ten words to each other for like … years now."

"Dosent that give you a good indication as I don't want to speak with you?!" Sheldon said balling his fists. "You made my life miserable!"

"Well maybe if ya wernt such a little weirdo, I wouldn't have!."

"You've always been jealous of my superior intellect." Sheldon folded his arms huffing.

"For godsake Shelly that was twenty years ago!" He demanded "You left for Germany when you were like twelve, and I havent seen you 'cept for the occalional funeral since!"

Knowing him rather well, Leonard knew Sheldon cared for his mother a great deal, and despite his objections, admitted he loved his sister enough to protect her. But he rarely mentioned his brother, however - did have a single family photo of the five of the Coopers when he was a little boy sitting next to his Halo helmet on the bookshelf next to his dusty old PC in the back of the apartment. The picture remained polished and dusted amoung the knock knacks that were usually forgotten about.

Leonard looked at Sheldon. "What happened between you too?"

"He deeply betrayed me that's what!" Sheldon yelped

"Oh com'on Shelly!" George said rolling his eyes. "Your still on about that science thingy I won?"

Leonard looked at Sheldon and George. "Wait what science thingy?"

Sheldon sunk his head between his shoulders and sulked. "He stole my award from me that's what!" Sheldon spat. "It was Fall of 1987, and a young Sheldon Cooper was on his way to achieving greatness, only to be struck down in his prime by this loathsome knuckle dragging troglodyte!" He flung his arm at George.

"You just call me a troll?" He growled aggressively, taking a step forward. "What about you?! You tried to kill my wife by poisnering her with some crazy nuclear warhead!"

Leonard did a double take! "You what?!"

Sheldon snorted. "Perposterous! I merely needed a test subject! I had no intention of harming Collette! Her eyes brows grew back!"

"Whoa whoa whoa…Someone explain to me whats going on because I cant wrap my mind around this at all!" Penny said staring at the two Cooper brothers.

"As per usual." Sheldon growled

George sat down on the right and side of the couch. Sheldon bared his teeth. "That's my spot!" Sheldon said raising his voice. "Get out of my spot."

"Oh Come'on Sheldon, hes family." Penny said twirling her hair.

Ignoring her, George smirked and flexed his muscles. "Make me Smelly pooper."

Sheldon strode up to him. "I said get out of my spot!" Sheldon growled. "In fact get out of my apartment!" He flung his arm dramaticly towards the door.

"Nope." He smirked. All of the sudden they were boys again, constantly bothering each other. "Mom said I could stay here."

"Well guess what? Moms not here! This is my place and Im a grown man! You cant tell me what to do anymore!"

George folded his arms and flexed aggressively. "Make me tough guy."

Sheldon became very quiet. All his childhood frustration, all the nooggies, wet willies, brusies and constant riducule balled up his his fists and he rounded on his brother and hit him as hard as he could, knocking him to the floor. Except George didn't stay down.

"Oh! you wanna go a couple rounds do ya?" George said wiping his mouth

"Whoa! Guys Com'on…." Leonard couldn't believe what he was seeing, the guys who hid in his room when people fought around him slugged his own brother and hard!

George got up and grabbed Sheldon by the collar. "This is for her! He hit Sheldon just as hard but Sheldon just got madder and soon they were rolling around on the floor.

"I didn't try to kill your wife! I was conducting an experiment!" He yelped and knashed

"Mom always liked you best!" George barked. "Her little genius baby!"

"You didn't deserve that award! It should have been mine! It was my idea! I could have won a nobel prize for that!"

"I was the one who did the science fair project! Its not my fault you were disqualifies for bing too young!" George growled as the grappled on the floor.

"You stole my invention!"

"Did not"

"Did too!"

"You stole her from me!"

"I did not!"

"Did too and you know it"

Penny's mouth hung open. Not only was Sheldon Cooper holding his own in a fight, but his hot hunky Brother was all sweaty and writhing on the ground with him. Suddenly the room got very warm. "Holy Crap!" Penny blurted

"Oh Mr Perfect!"

"That's because I am perfect!" Sheldon yelped when George puched him I the eye

"Yove always been jealous!"

"Im telling mom!"

"Im guna give you a Vulcan nerve pinch!"

"Ill show you a pinch!"

"You do and Ill knock you into next week."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah?"

"You jerk! You tore my shirt!"

"You tried to kill my wife you gol'darn manaiac!"

"Hey Langauge! Theres a lady present!" Sheldon socked his brother in the nose again.

George looked up wiping his mouth and nose which were bleeding.

"oh …sorry little lady." George said picking up Sheldon and dusting him off. "You weren't supposed to hear that."

Penny couldn't help but swoon over that kind of old fashioned galentry. "Oh its okay I have a brother too. Its cool." She said twirling a lock of her own hair.

Sheldon winced in pain, a dark blue lump was forming on his forhead, and he had a cut across his arm and cheek.

"Oh Sheldon sweety are you okay?" Penny asked concerned

"Me? Im fine." Sheldon swayed on his spot. "I've been beat up worst than this, by this oaf standing before me." Sheldon glared at his brother. "May I present George Marcus Cooper Jr, my brother."

"Weve met."

"So wait – You tried to kill his wife?!" Leonard couldn't get the idea out of his no matter how hard he tried.

Sheldon went to the fridge for his eye, and handed one to his brother despite their recent tussel. Both men put the frozen vegtables on their faces at the same time. Even thought George was eight years Sheldon's elder, their mannerisms were remarkably the same.

"I did NOT try to kill his wife, you see, when I was nine, I was conducting my high shool senior thesis on the brains activites in high protien stimulation test, and she agreed to be part of the study. I simply was studing the particle pyhsics found in brain activity due to high stress levels as the response foundations I had conducted at the time." Sheldon explained. "There was, I admit, a unfortaunte accident which did indeed land her in the hospital" Sheldon said adjusting the veggies, "But she did not sustain any lasting damanges and to this day she functions perfectly." He glared evily at his brother. "As I recall, someone decided to win her affections by pouring alcohol down her throat and recounting his old football staticiscs to her, as if she would be so weak as to fall that!"

"Shelly, for god sake you were a little kid! Do you honestly think you had a shot with her?!"

Leonard smirked. "Wait wait wait….you were in love with your brothers girlfriend?! That's what this is about?!"

Sheldon remained taughty and dignified. "I was not 'in love' with her, I simply recognized her as the interesting creature that she was, and the fact she happened to smell like lilacs in bloom."

"Seriously?" Leonard couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"As a young man on the treashold of manhood, I was obviously victum to the endorfend related brain activity associated with female prowess, as well as the fact her affections were returned to me, and this caused my brain, as magnifacant as it is, to temporaily manfunction. The brain's nureron receptors constantly repeat in the the insular cortex (insula) and striatum,giving the illusion of emotional attachements and…."

"He never shuts up. Hell go on like this for a while, can I get you something to drink?" Penny offered smiling.

"Oh yeah…" George grunted and folded his arms. He turned to Leonard. "Hey…Watch this." He said smugly. "Hey - Shelly how big is that pi number?"

Sheldon sighed heavily, hating to being cut off in the middle of one of his famous rants. "Oh for heavens sake….Im not falling for that again. "

"Why whatsa matter? Don't you know?" He gave Leonard a knowing grin.

"You know very well that I know what the answer is."

"So what is it?"

Sheldon swelled in anger.

"Humph. Some genius." George thumbed at his brother and winked at Penny who blushed "Dosent even know what pi is…"

his eye twitching, Persing his lips, Sheldon breathed in for a long time….

"3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097494459230781640628620899862803482534211706798214808651328230664709384460955058223172535940812848111745028410270193852110555964462294895493038196442881097566593344612847564823378678316527120190914564856692346034861045432664821339360726024914127372458700660631558817488152092096282925409171536436789259036001133053054882046652138414695194151160943305727036575959195309218611738193261179310511854807446237996274956735188575272489122793818301194912983367336244065664308602139494639522473719070217986094370277053921717629317675238467481846766940513200056812714526356082778577134275778960917363717872146844090122495343014654958537105079227968925892354201995611212902196086403441815981362977477130996051870721134999999837297804995105973173281609631859502445945534690830264252230825334468503526193118817101000313783875288658753320838142061717766914730359825349042875546873115956286388235378759375195778185778053217122680661300192787661119590921642019893809525720106548586327886593615338182796823030195203530185296899577362259941389124972177528347913151557485724245415069595082953311686172785588907509838175463746939319255060400927701671139009848824012858361603563707660104710181942955596198946767837449448255379774" Sheldon began to turn deep red and still he went on.

"72684710404753464620804668425906949129331367702898915210475216205696602405803815019351125338243003558764024749647326391419927260426992279678235478163600934172164121992458631503028618297455570674983850549458858692699569092721079750930295532116534498720275596023648066549911988183479775356636980742654252786255181841757467289097777279380008164706001614524919217321721477235014144197356854816136115735255213347574184946843852332390739414333454776241686251898356948556209921922218427255025425688767179049460165346680498862723279178608578438382796797668145410095388378636095068006422512520511739298489608412848862694560424196528502221066118630674427862203919494504712371378696095636437191728746776465757396241389086583264599581339047802759009946576407895126946839835259570982582262052248940772671947826848260147699090264013639443745530506820349625245174939965143142980919065925093722169646151570985838741059788595977297549893016175392846813826868386894277415599185592524595395943104997252468084598727364469584865383673622262609912460805124388439045124413654976278079771569143599770012961608944169486855584840635342207222582848864815845602850601684273452267467678895252138522549954666727823986456596116354886230577456498035593634568174324112515076069479451096596094025228879710893145669136867228748940560101503308…" Sheldon dropped like a ragdoll to the ground unconsconcsious.

Leonard stared with his mouth open. "That's amazing! You've provided a paradox to his natural instinct to pathalogically finish things.

"Me and Missy used to do that to him when he was little. Missy used to call it the Shelbot shut down."


	23. Chapter 23

The following week, Amy and Penny were headed to her place when George came out locking the door. Amy stopped dead. "Hooo!" She peeped and clapped her hand over her mouth. George turned, confused what the noise had been and his face blossomed into a wide grin

"Well hello there little lady."

Amy's eyes grew the size of saucers.

"George Cooper Jr." He said extending his hand.

Amy held out a trembling hand, and he kissed it. Penny beamed at the sight of this.

"Oh my…" Amy's breath caught in her throat. Penny smirked happily.

"Sorry, but you are just cute as the dickens. Do you wanna have dinner with me tommaraw night? Say eight-ish?"

"Uhhh,…. Um…." Amys jaw dangled open.

"Shed love to! " Penny answered for her.

"That's just awesome to hear. Ill see you then cutie." George winked at her and headed downstairs to fetch his laundry.

"Toodle-ooh!" Amy managed to say

Penny steered her into the apartment.

"Oh my god! That was awesome Amy! You got a date with George!"

Amy's head was spinning. She had seen pictures of Sheldon's brother but hed barley mentioned him. She knew they had some sort of falling out and Sheldon was always very mum on the subject. It was one of the things that caused her to think of him unpleasaltly. Hed always kept his family away from her, where-as she wanted to show him off to hers. The jerk. Her thoughts rested on Sheldon for a long moment. She wished that it was Sheldon who asked her to dinner, and maybe dancing in an effort to apolgize, but no, all she got was empty pleading, and reminders that he was superior to her intellectually. The small part of her that felt guilty at being attracted to his brother was quickly extinguished.

"Amy?" Penny asked. "Are you okay?"

Amy smiled proudly and pleased. "Better than ok! I have a date." She couldn't help it. It felt wonderful. Her whole life shed longed for the sort of affectionate attention other girls got from boys. Shed never been to her prom, she never went to a school dance, and with the small exception of several pecks on the cheek and a few good ones, shed barely kissed a boy. She wasn't even sure Sheldon was the type of boy she would want to compare kissing with. Then, she realized, she was being desired, whooed even. A gorgoues guy had asked her out without loosing a bet, or being her cousin. He actually wanted to hang out with her and it felt wonderful. "A real date with a real boy!"

"Oh my god lets go shopping!" Penny said excitedly

"Wow. I cant believe this is happening!" Amy felt like she was drunk. Things like this never happened to her. Penny sure, but never her. A small part of her feared the worst, that it was some evil plot to embarrase her. It wouldn't be the first time a cute boy fiened liking her only to play some cruel joke.

"Penny?"

"yeah?"

"Is…is this really happeneing? Hes not like….gunna throw pigs blood on me right? Or leave me in some godforsakeden place with no shoes right?"

Penny's shoulders fell. She looked at Amy with deep symathy and kindness in her eyes. "I promise I wont let that happen."

Amy smiled softly. "Okay." She said. "Are you sure?"

"If he does Ill kick his ass just like Sheldon did.!" She said proudly "Now com'on the malls awaitin!"


	24. Chapter 24

The next day, Sheldon sat in his spot ever now and then throwing dirty looks at his brother whose very presence seemed to cause him great discomfort.

Leonard was finding Sheldon's misery pleasing at first, for it was always enjoyable to him to see other people at the mercy of Sheldons antics besides him. The only problem was this wasnt Sheldon being upset because a set of personal rules that someone had unknowing broken, or some silly obsessive compulsive issue Sheldon had. This was downright Sheldon getting bullied with nothing he could do about it. Leonard saw all the years of torment his brother had beset on him. In the small few days he was living there, hed pushed Sheldon around, and Leonard realized he understood his friend a lot better. It was like the day Sheldon suggested he return a video to demonstrate what its like to be like him, and all day long he had to wear a dreadfully uncomfortable itchy sweater.

Here however was the justification of Sheldon's desire for constant control over any situation. He grew up in a house where he had no control over anything, save for formulas and equations, and what the universe offered him. But in his own house where a child is meant to be cared for and safe, he felt threatened at every turn.

Sheldon had never felt so ill at ease. He had developed a tick in his right eye every time he looked over at his brother when he sat in his spot, or when George didn't wipe the mirror in the bathroom, and how he used the 't' in often. George also didn't clean up after himself, and was rather a huge slob. Sheldon was being driven up the wall, and while Leonard normally enjoyed when Sheldon felt so unhappy, this was something different entirely. Everything about him seemed to bother Sheldon. Leonard wondered what it must have been like to share a room together growing up as he drove home with their evening's takeout.

As George was getting ready for the evening, Sheldon noticed him and found his interest had piqued. "What are you getting dressed up for? Where are you going?"

"I gotta a date with the cute lil number across the hall."

Sheldon did a double take. Penny? "No you don't." He said evenly

Looking over his shoulder he smiled wide. "Yeah I do. I cant wait to break that filly in. Hoo-wee."

Sheldon tensed. Did Leonard know? He wondered. Caught in a moral dilemma he began to fret. Leonard would be devistated if his girlfriend was about to step out on him, with his revolting brother of all people. As Sheldons finished thinking this, in walked Leonard with dinner.

Leonard looked at Sheldon and swallowed, noticing George getting ready. Penny had texted him the details, and he deliberately picked up dinner and had plans of keeping Sheldon distracted.

"Hey. Sheldon, I got Thai just the way you like it. Wanna eat and then play Halo, and then maybe we can watch the Red Dwarf marathon? He tried to keep Sheldon occupied.

Sheldon looked at his poor fool of a friend in pity. He was a such a sweet guy, and here was Penny about to step out on him.

"Leonard you deserve better." He said

"What? What are you talking about?" Leonard said confused

"I have no choice, as your best friend, I have to stop this from happening if I can." Sheldon said bravely.

"What?" Leonard looked at him.

"This testosterone filled Neanderthal has plans of taking your girl friend out for a night of frivolity and eventual cioutus.!" He threw his lanky arm out at his bewildered brother.

"Uh…I don't know what that means." George said fixing his tie

"Wait – youre taking Penny out?" Leonard rounded on George.

"No." George said innocently, and then he stopped. "Wait - is she the blond or the brunette?"

"The blond!" Leonard growled

"Oh no - Im takin the other one out. She looks like she needs a good Texas long horn." He chuckled stupidly.

Sheldon dropped his tai on the floor. "Wha-Exscuse me?!"

Leonard winced. "Sheldon …. Now…take it easy."

"No I will not take it easy!" Sheldon stood up and looked positivlty out of his mind. "I will not let you … " He stopped having no idea what his brother was going to do. "Do…whatever it is youre planning on doing!" He finished proudly

George rolled his eyes. "Do I have to kick your ass again?" He said annoyed. "Now get out of my way small fry." George shoved Sheldon.

"I will not yield." Sheldon stood bravely in his brothers way.

"Shelly…" George said menacingly.

"Sheldon…." Leonard warned. He saw Sheldon was liable to do something drastic, not to mention his brother outweighed him by forty pounds of muscle.

When a knock came at the door, George fixed his hair . "Saved by the bell squirt." He shoved his brother out the way again.

Amy stood in the door in her best dress, beaming. Penny had done her hair, and makeup and she felt she looked ravishing.

Sheldon found he couldn't breathe. "A-Amy?" He squeaked. Penny had given her one of her better going-out-on-the-town dresses, and despite her normal wallflower mystique she found she liked this new look. Her dress was powder blue, and there was a small bow in her hair. It showed too much of her legs for her taste but the effect was appartely giving the boys a show, so she went with it.

Lenard, Sheldon and George stood there gaping with their mouths open.

"Hi." She looked up at George and grinned.

Geoorge ran his hand over his rugged stubbled jaw looking at her up and down much in the way lions see their prey. "Mmmm—mmmm" He threw his a rougish debonaire grin and she practily swooned. "Ima gunna show you the time of yer life darlin'"

"Oh my." Amy blushed and looked away bashful.

Sheldon found he couldn't move, or breath or speak. He just stood there gawking with his mouth open. His brain had seemed to have stopped working all together.

"Sheldon? Your eye!" Amy looked around George and noticed Sheldon's eye. "What happned?"

"Aww, we just were rough-housin' is all - ya know how it is. Me and m'little brother always are causing a rukus aint we Shelly?" George ruffled Sheldons hair aggressively. Sheldon was seething.

"Are you alright?" She made to go to him, George flung his arm around her waist causing her to yelp with surprise He held her close to his chest and wiggled his eyebrows at her, and he made for the door.

"Well com'on sugar, have I got a night planned you will never forget."

Amy looked remorsefully over her should at Sheldon and Leonard. "Well, goodnight." She called

George stuck his head out the door just before closing it giving both Leonard and Sheldon an evil grin. Leonard painfully watched as Sheldon stood there helplessly as Amy was swept from the room by his bigger, cooler, stronger, and better looking big brother. When Amy closed the door behind her, her heart broke when she saw the look of devistation on Sheldon' face.

Sheldon swayed on the spot as if hed narrowly missed being hit by a bus. His head swam and he found he was dizzy. He sat down slowly in his spot. Leonard looked at him with sympathy.

"You okay?"

Sheldon nodded.

"Sorry buddy." Leonard said. "You want some coca?"

Sheldon nodded again, but he knew in his heart no amount of hot beverage would soothe him.


	25. Chapter 25

"Im not going to take this lying down!" Sheldon paced back and forth in fornt of Leonard positively shaking with rage. "Hes not gunna do it to me again!" Sheldon slapped his fist in his hand.

Leonard sat looking sadly at his friend. "Calm down. You need to relax…"

"I will not calm down! This is unaccpetbale! This is an outrage!" Sheldons eyes darted about the room. "Its high time I put a stop to him for once and for all!"

"What are you gunna do? Put a whooppe cushion under his seat?"

"NO! Im gunna fight! Grab your keys Im gunna go get my woman back!" Sheldon demanded. "To the Leonard-mobile!"

When they shut the doors, and eonard had started the car he stopped.

"Well what are you waiting for!? Drive man!""

"Where are we going?" Leonard asked simply

Sheldon stopped dead.

"You have no idea where they went do you?"

Sheldon crossed his arms and slumped back in the seat with a deep scowl on his face. "Curses. A flaw in an otherwise perfect plan."

Beside himself with greif, and anger Sheldon dragged Leonard to the Cheesecake Factory bar where he was determined to numb his inability to properly express his current feelings about a situation he couldn't really communicate in words.

"Sheldon this is stupid! Lets go home!" Leonard said "You know you don't drink!"

Penny, who was tending bar looked at him sadly. "Sweety, I know it hurts, but this is a big deal for Amy." Penny said consolingly. "She was so excited. Try and be happy for her."

Leonard looked up at her. "Youre not helping."

Sheldon sighed miserably. "Penny can I have one of those iced teas you made for me?" He grunted "I need a treat to cheer me up…"

"Uh…no. I don't think you can handle tea tonight." Penny said remembring when shed made him three strong LI Iced teas and he downed them in three gulps.

Leonard looked at him. "Sheldon com'on lets go home. Theres nothing you can do if she wants to date other people."

"This is Collete all over again." Sheldon lamented.

Penny and Leonard looked at each other.

"Whos Collete?"

Sheldon slapped his hand on the bar. "I need whiskey!"

"But Sheldon…"

"Manager?...Manager…this woman is refusing to serve me!" Sheldon looked around and held out his finger importantly "I want a drink and I want it Now!" He demanded.

"ok…ok." Penny said begrudgingly

"Sheldon you know this isn't going to help." Leonard said rolling his eyes.

"Leonard shut up and drink." Sheldon barked.

"Now whos Collete?" Penny was ravenous for Sheldon to dish this one out.

"She was this girl my brother and I grew up with, of whom I was rather fond of, but George stole her from me, and left me to fend for myself in the cold cruel world alone." Sheldon explained.

"yeah, but wernt you like 11 years old at the time?"

"I was 12! " Sheldon said haughty. "Collete was one of very few indiviuals I found truly interesting. She had bright green eyes, and her hair smelled like honeysuckle in summertime." Sheldon grumbled, staring out into space with a vivid memory. "We used to watch Starwars and she read comic books with me. She had excellent taste in literature."

"Wow, she sounds amazing." Leonard said wondering what sort of woman this could be who would be interested in Sheldon romanticly.

"She was. Once she even brought me to a book signing from George Lucas."

Leonard's eyebrows shot up impressed, giving Penny a look. "So you spent a lot of time together?"

"Well, when my mom had to work at the grocery store and my dad was out looking for work, shed come over and wed hang out."

Penny shook her head. "Sheldon, sweety, I think maybe she was your babysitter! You just had a crush on your babysitter!" She said exhasperated. "Its like a totally normal thing."

"Nonsence! I was able to take care of myself at the age of four, why on earth would I need a babysitter?! And why would my mother hire someone who came over to the house on a regular basis anyway?"

"You need a babysitter now!" Leonard said

Penny looked at the ceiling for assistance. "Sweety…she came over on a regular basis because your mom probably paid her to."

"Oh That's ridculouds!"

Leonard looked at Penny. "Well, it does sort of make sense of why she would be hanging around you all the time Sheldon. And it also explains why your brother was dating her too."

Sheldons face turned an ugly shade of red. "He didn't appricate her like I did." He said angrily, but then his face fell as he realized there were other people in his life he didn't properly appricate as he should have. "Give me another drink."

"Right now my brute of a brother is out with her, probably forcing himself on her."

"Sheldon! That's a terrible thing to say about your brother! Hed never do that!" Leonard said affronted.

"Well Amy's far too intelligent to fall for his silver tounged romantic gestures. She'll see right through him." Sheldon slurred. "That muscle bound moron is probably got her in his truck by now…"

"Sheldon… I know your sad about loosing Amy but you cant think shed give it up on the first date with your brother…Amys not like that and you know it!"

Sheldon relented. "That is true. Shes a lady." Sheldon said in thought, but then he looked up at Penny. "You didn't give her any dating advice did you?"

"Me? Well ya know a little…"

"Oh great! That means she's having coitus right now!"

Penny sighed. "Why do I bother?" -


	26. Chapter 26

As George sat with Amy at dinner, his rugged good looks and dashing smile didn't seem to be working on her. She felt a bit like Belle being out to dinner with Gaston…

"Whats the matter darlin' don't ya like your supper?" I saw this eye-tailian joint and thought it would be the perfect place for ya…."

Amy picked at her pasta. "Its good." She said evenly. She couldn't help but feel dreadfilly guilty for what she was doing. Afterall, he had apolgizged and pleaded with her to take him back. The look on his face when they left was all she could think about. Also it didn't help that George wasn't much of an intellectual speaker.

"Whats a matter then. Normally I like when a chick shuts the hell up, but ya look like somethin's on that pretty little mind o- yers."

Amy looked up at him. "Im sorry, that isn't polite of me." She said straightening in her chair.

"So, what do you do for a living?"

"Well right now, Im uh, ya know kinda in between stuff, but I normally do construction." Amys thoughts betrayed her.

"With sweaty men in hard hats? Carring lumber over their shoulders? With their tool belts dangling and their bare chests glistening in the hot sun?" Amy said with a far off look in her eyes. But when she thought about it, all the men in her construction site were gangly and pale for some reason. They all had black feathery hair and had a crouching gate to them.

"Uh…I guess." He said. "What do you do? You seem like a librarian or something"

"Im a nuerobiologist. Im currently working on brain stem activity as it relates to behaviorism in monkees, and the controlling corrality theorm."

George had the same blank expression Penny got when she would explain what she was currently working on in her lab. "I like monkees."

"I work in a university." She finished simply. George leered at her. "Ya uh…that's great….you uh…how about we finish our supper and uh….wanna go see what the back of my truck looks like?"

Amy looked confused. "That's an interesting question." She said thoughtfully. "I assume like any other truck, with seating for three people and ample seatbelts." She said in her monotone voice. "Did you know that the term internal combustion engine usually refers to an engine in which combustion is intermittent, such as the more familiar four-stroke and two-stroke piston engines, along with variants, such as the six-stroke piston. A second class of internal combusti, and the Winkle rotary engine on engines use continuous combustion: turbines, jets, and most rockets each of which are internal combustion engines on the same principle.

George stroked his rugged chicsled chin. "Hmm…I do love a girl that's into cars." He said with a devious naughty look on his face.

"I find your notion that a female who would be interested in the internal combustion engine intregring."

George looked at her and burst out laughing. "Damn honey you sure do got a great sense of humor thats awfully funny."

"Why is that funny?"

George stopped laughing. "Uh… nevermind." He regaurded her. "You know - you remind me of m'brother a little bit."

"Well, we did used to be … together." She said evenly

"Get outta town! You and Sheldon?"

"Yes. We were quite the item." She said biting the air with every syllable.

"Damn, I didn't know he had it in'nim." George sat back in his chair and threw his elbow over the back of his seat. "Well Ill be damned.…" George smiled fondly. "

Amy stared at him. "Yes we were together for almost four years."

"huh." George said with his bottom lip stick out. "M'mom mentioned he was seeing some scientist chick. This is just like the time he had a thing for this girl we used to know growing up. He used to follow her around everywhere."

"Sheldon!? Had a crush on a girl?"

"I know! Hard to believe right?" George said grinning. "But he aint all science and comic books." He said. "Don't let him fool ya. Hes a sucker for a pretty face the same way we all are." George said winking at Amy again. Amy blushed.

"You mean to tell me you were both vailing for the same females affections?"

"Uh..." His mouth dangled open for a bit. "Well Sheldon was like I'dknow maybe eleven twelve years old. Hed come back from grad school for the summer and met Collette. She was the first girl wed ever seen Sheldon interact with in that way ya know? We always assumed he was … well… ya know - Light in his loafers" He wiggled his wrist limply. "He was over the moon for her…" He said. "He never had a chance o'course, he was only a little kid. " George had a strange hard lok on his face. It was remorse for some reason Amy noticed this and found herself leabing closer to him to find out more. "But she ended up datin' me for a couple years and we got married after that." George finished his story with a far off look of regret.

"So that's why you guys haven't talked in years? He thinks you stole his girl?"

"He can be the most stubborn kid on the planet! And I didn't steal his girl she was in to me more than she was into him!"

Amy looked at him. "And Sheldon never told her how he felt about her?"

"I guess not. But he was also still a little kid I mean what was she gunna do with him? Take him to the park?. . Oh, well, that was right around the time we stopped talking to each other. He left for college when I was still in high school, I mean whater ya gunna say to yer little brother when he acts like you don't matter to'im."

Amy had no words.

"Ya know, he really has a thing for you too."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he used to look at Collete the same way as he looks at you."

Amy sighed and sadly looked away.

"What happened with you two? Anyways? I mean I know hes an ass but … you seem like a sweet thing, howd you get mixed up with the likes o'him in the first place?"

Amy sat straighter in her chair and threw her shoulders back with dignaity. "Our relationship was not deterministic of a proportional affection implementation which caused me to rethink our mutual relationship agreement."

"So he was an ass."

"Pretty much."

George chuckled at the absurdity of it all. "It's a Cooper thing. My dad, me and Sheldon all love women were terrible to. I don't know why. But it's a thing we do. I did it to my wife, my dad did it to his, and now Shelly did to you." He said miserably.

"Guess us Cooper boys are un-lovable." George said sadly. "Im in the mess I am because of it. Collete was the best thing that ever happened and I didn't appricate her. Sheldon was right, I should have paid more attention to her and not ignored her all the time. I was an idiot for loosing her. " George found he wasn't hungry anymore. "Now hes gone and done the same thing to a darlin little doll like you."

Amy's defenses dropped. "No Im sure that's not true. I mean - He wasn't horrible all the time, in fact as boyfreinds go, Sheldon was …" Amy stopped and thought about what Sheldon really was. The time hed gotten her a tiara because he was sorry, the time hed put her down as his emergency contact at the Univetsity. When hes taken care of her when she was sick. He even texted her little algorthums that when solved were the answers to amusing riddles or jokes. She began to miss him terribly, and her heart ached when she thought of him. Many people don't believe it to be true, but hearts can be broken. Literaly. There is a serious actual pain when one looses someone they love, it's a physical reaction to a mental process. This is what Amy felt, real pain. Had she let Sheldon go because she was simply too stubborn and hurt too?

"Ya know George, I don't believe that for a second. Cooper men are very lovable, but its like the old adage goes ; you don't know what you have until you no longer have it."

"Heh. I used to play that song over and over when me and Collete ended it. I was a wreck when she broke it off."

"Interesting. What did you do to cause her to come to this conclusion?"

"Nothin." George shrugged "I still don't know. What ever it was though, it dosent matter. I should have treated her better for the start. I blew it."

Amy looked down at her phone. It was from Leonard.


	27. Chapter 27

After several whiskeys later (Penny was doing shots instead of Leonard who had to drive) all three giggled jovialy.

Sheldon swayed happily on his bar stool. "ya know what I love about you guys?"

"No what?" Smirked Penny stupidly

"Youre always there for me. When no body else is." One of Sheldon's eye lids drooped.

"Aww…thanks sweety." Penny slurred. "Ya know Sheldon, its probably the Jameson talking, but your brothers hot!"

Sheldon threw her a dirty look.

"Hey!" Leonard demanded. "Im hot too!"

"Sure you are." Penny kissed him deeply. "Youre my little Bensen burner."

"Its Bunson."

They both giggled.

"That's nice. You love each other. " Sheldon sputtlered, grinning stupidly with his chin in his hand slumping over the top of the bar.

Leonard looked at his friend with a soft half smile, like he had a little secret he couldn't tell him.

"I never told her that."

Leonard looked at him. "What? Never told who what?"

"Amy - I never told her I how I felt about her. All those chances I had, even when she asked me directly, and I blew them all."

"Aww, Sheldon sweety, Im sure she knew."

Leonard was on his phone texting. "Keep talking Sheldon, Im listening."

"I never told her I loved her." He said looking down at the bar. He looked at Leonard and Penny and frowned. "I never told her that her eyes twinkle like a star right before its about to die, and I never told her how I love the little crinkle in her nose when she's thinking really hard, Or the way she uses ampersands instead of plus signs or the way her shoes squeak when she walks, or how when she gets up in the morning her hair sticks up and she looks like Sonic the hedgehog. I love the way she smells like formadlide and dandruff shampoo, or that she walks like a duck, and I love the way her teeth stick out when she laughs and the way she gets mad at me when she knows Im right." Sheldon declared. "Im a selfish ego-maniacal jerk." Sheldon said miserably. "No wonder she left me. I cant believe I never said that every day I was with her was the best time I ever had, or that I was a better man for having known her."

"Oh my god Sheldon! That's like the sweetest thing I ever heard! And I cant believe it came from you!" Penny wiped tears from her eyes.

"Its true. All the times I could have told her that she makes me feel like I could take on Dark Side the conquerer with my bare hands. Id give anything for one chance to tell her that I she's all I think about." Sheldon said. His mind was a haze, and his eyes drooped drunkenly, but he meant every word. "But she wont even talk to me." Sheldon slumped and took another gulp of his whiskey.

"Hold that thought Sheldon." Penny said holding up a finger.

"I cant believe what an idiot I am for letting a girl like that slip through my fingers. I wish I could tell her how I really feel."

"You could say it now." Said a voice behind him


	28. Chapter 28

"A-Amy?" Sheldon spun around, his jaw dropping. He tried to remain cool, but he was way too drunk for that. "Wh-what are you doing here?" Then he remembered why he was angry. "Wheres George?" He said stiffly

"I told him to take me home."

Sheldon was taken aback. "You did?" He looked at her as if hed never seen her before. He just took her in. Then his brain seemed to turn back on. "Wait, howd you know where I was?"

"I got Leonards text, and came right over."

"His text?" Sheldon asked stupidly

"He said you were drowing your sorrows at the bottle of Whiskey and you were a mess, and he wouldn't listen to anyone…" Amy shrugged. "I got worried about you." She said. "You know you cant hold your liquor, and I thought maybe youd … do something rash given the fact that George and I…." She didn't finish the sentence.

Sheldon began to bristle. "I don't want to hear what you and my brother did tonight." He said turning

"Its not what you think Sheldon. Not at all. Your brother is a actually really nice..."

"Oh I bet he is!" Sheldon sneered

"And whats that supposed to mean?"

"What do you think it means?" Sheldon spat "I know your only a biologist but even you cant be that stupid!" He slurred.

Amys voice cracked. "You…you … think that I would…."

"Well you certainly look the part!" Sheldon hissed. "How much is your going rate?!"

"Sheldon!" Leonard said reproachfully

Amy breathed in heavily. "No" She held up a hand at Leonard. "No its fine Leonard. Sheldon is entitled to his opinion. For your information, Penny helped me pick this outfit out." She said looking dreadfully uncomfortable in it now, pulling her skirt down sheepishly.

"Well that explains it! You took hooker advice from the loosest waitress in Pasadena!"

"Hey what the hell Sheldon!?" Penny said angrily

"That's enough!" Leonard was on his feet now. "You take that back now!"

"I will not! Shes been turning tricks with my brother!" Sheldon pointed a drunken angrily finger at Amy.

"How can you say something so awful?" Amy said her lips was trembling but she managed to hold back her tears and instead tensed with fury.

"Don't take it personally Amy, hes really drunk." Leonard said bracingly

"Well the truth hurts!" Sheldon said swaying in his seat

Amy grimaced. "Oh you want truth?!' She said stepping closer to him and him retreating with every step. "The truth is you're a callous, selfish and spoiled brat who cant stand to not get his way. Even your so-called friends cant stand to be around you and the only reason Leonard dosent throw you out is that he feels sorry for you! You waste your life playing meaningless video games and reading silly comics when any real work you could be doing is getting published by better minds than you. You've never been able to prove any of the theories you claim to have come up with, and when it comes down it, for all your brillance Sheldon….your nothing but a hack!" Amy spat, her eyes blazed.

"How dare you?!" Sheldon said dramaticly

"Oh for god sake Sheldon." Leonard said rolling his eyes.

Sheldon rounded on Leonard. "So! Judas! Im such a burden huh?"

Leonard swelled in anger. "You just called my girlfriend a whore!" Leonard barked. "And I tell you I cant stand you all the time!" Leonard said throwing up his hands. "You're the most impossible human being on the planet!" Leonard said poking him in the chest. "Youre being cruel to everyone around you who actually likes you even though the real issue you here is your brother treated you like crap so you treat everyone else like crap, including the girl who, you just not three minutes ago, expressed your undying love for!"

Sheldon had seemed to reach some amount of sober line of thought. He shook his head trying to clear the cobwebs out. He looked at everyone around him sheepishly.

Sheldon swallowed heavily. "Your right." Sheldon said softly bowing his head in submission. "I admit, I didnt mean those things I said. I take it back, it was uncalled for and unfounded. I don't really believe youre a whore" Sheldon said evenly. "Penny Im sorry." He said in small voice. He looked at Leonard. "Leonard I owe you an apology as well. I was out of line"

Leonard sighed heavily, and nodded.

Penny looked at him with meaning. "Sheldon, don't you have something you want to say to Amy?"

"No I think she said enough." Sheldon said.

Amy threw up her hands in exasperation. " I give up. Im going home."

Sheldon seemed forget why he was mad in the first place. "Amy….Amy wait for me."

Amy rounded on him. "Do you honestly think Im going to talk to you after what you just said?"

Sheldon's eyes drooped and swayed stupidly. "Wait - What did I say?"

"Are you kidding!? You just called me a street walker! You accused me of having ciotus with your brother and to top it all off youre a colossal ass hat!"

"But I love you."

Amy slapped him as hard as she could.

Sheldon yelped in pain. "OW! You hit me!"

"You deserved it!"

Sheldon was affronted. "Whatd you hit me for?"

"You cant say something like that when your drunk! You have to mean it!"

"But I did mean it!" Sheldon protested

"I want the truth about how you feel Sheldon Cooper, not some Whiskey filled lement!"

Sheldon stopped, trying feebily to remain still without swaying which proved increasingly hard. He cleared his throat. "The truth is…" Sheldon began. "The truth is, …" He stumbled. This was incredibly diffuclut. His brain seemed to be trying to reboot itself and then crashing again. "The truth is I cant stand the thought of life without you." He said. Sheldon held her hand and looked in her eyes with his glassey ones. "Youre the one person in my life I don't mind having around all the time." Sheldon said looking down at her hand. "And all I want to do is be near you, and be with you, and look at you." He said.

Amy stared at him, in disbelief. Everyone was quiet. No one seemed to want to say anything. Sheldon grinned like an idiot at her, and lost his balance and fell. Amy looked at him reserved, piercing her lips. "Sheldon! Look at you - youre encouragble!"

"You still mad at me?" He asked playfully. Amy sighed heavily. "Come on, lets get you to bed." Amy said helping him up. He could barley stand.

Leonard quickly dashed under his other arm to keep him from dropping. "Whoa whoa easy there." Leonard looked over his shoulder at Penny and waived a kiss at her. Smiling at the events as they unfolded and waived back him wiping the bar clean. Sheldon looked at both Amy and Leonard who were helping him walk. "You guys are awesome." He said jovially.

"yeah ok…one foot in front of the other buddy." Leonard grunted.

"I imagine I must look a lot like my father right now. My Uncle used to bring him home under his arm all the time. He always said if you when you've had enough when the floor keeps pullin ya down." Sheldon chuckled to himself.

"That's great. Watch your head" Leonard said opening his car door.

Sheldon and Amy were in the back seat of Leonards car, he was fast asleep slumped on her shoulder , his mouth hanging open.

Amy smiled softly at him. Getting him upstairs was quite a feat, and they finally got him to bed he slumped over knocked out.

Amy, sat on the edge of his bed gazed at him. Out of pure instinct, Sheldon snuggled up against her and she wasted no time in taking advantage of the opportunity, and snuggled under his arms as he spooned her, falling fast asleep herself.

Leonard grinned at the sight. Sighing in relief and closing the door quietly after. He found George on the couch in Sheldons spot watching sport center.

George looked over at Leonard. "He okay?" He asked casually.

Leonard nodded. "Yeah."

"That boy never could hold his liquor."

George smiled knowingly. Leonard sat down beside him. "Ya know, that was a pretty cool thing you did for him." Leonard said. "Amy told me what you said at dinner."

"Yeah well, I kinda owed him." He shrugged.

"He can be a handful." Leonard echoed.

"Yep." George said with a playful smile swigging his beer.

Leonard sat beside him. "So what was it like growing up with Sheldon?"

"Wasn't easy I can tell ya that…" George sighed. "Had to kick a lot of asses for him, and he still managed to get beat up like everyday"

Leonard nodded in agreement for he knew all too well what it was like to receive daily beatings from those bigger and stronger than him.

"Its not easy havin' to stand up for a guy who could care less if you are in his life or not." George said not looking at anyone in particular.

Leonard regarded George for a long time. "I don't think that's the case." He said. "I think Sheldon, in his own way, really looks up to you."

"What would you know about it? Pretty sure he never mentions me."

Leonard nodded in agreement to this. "No, he dosent, but I do know he loves his family more than hed like to admit."

"He loves mom…and Im not really sure if he gives a crap about Missy or not, but I know for a fact I don't matter to that kid at all. He even told me so." George grunted.

Leonard realized that all the bickering and fighting and dirty looks were all pent up conversations the brothers Cooper never had. He saw for the first time that George picked on Sheldon for nothing more than to get his attention. Similarly to the way a child acts out against their parents. He wished he could do something to bring them together, but then he remembered he never talked to his own family. "Excuse me for a minute." He got up leaned on his counter and pulled out his phone.

"Hey, Micheal? Its me Leonard. … Im good, how are you doing?" He asked smiling warmly. It was amazing how long it had been since hed heard his own brothers voice. "That's awesome! Really? Tenure? Wow! Good for you!... " He said in a tersed clench jaw sort of voice. Then he remembered why he never called. "Me? Well, Im working on laser convention theories… yeah oh - you did? From who? Oh! Well Sheldon and mom talk all the time – wait he did? When? He sent you notes on your disritataion? …." Leonard's shoulders slumped and he grimaced. "Yeah Ill be sure to tell him how much you appricate talking to a real intellectual like him. " Leonard lamented. Leonard said solemy. "Yeah … you too. I will. Say hi to mom and Emily for me. Okay. Bye." Leonard hung up the phone and was very quiet. Somethings never changed.

He sat back down on the couch next to George. "You know, I cant believe Im saying this, but youre really lucky to have a brother like Sheldon."

"What do you mean? You are his brother." George growsed.

Leonard smiled fondly over that fact. "Yeah…I guess we are like brothers."


	29. Chapter 29

The next morning Sheldon awoke, with jackhammers pounding in between his ears. His eyes were clammed shut but the evil sunlight seemed to be winning the fight , no matter how hard he tried to shut it out.

He opened one blearly eye and looked down at his arm. There was a lock of auburn brown hair draped over his arm. It was connected to a head and shoulders. Sheldon's eyes snapped open "A-Amy?"

Amy looked up at him sleepily. "Morning." She muttered, and stretched

Sheldon stared at her. How on earth had this happened. Was he in a different dimension? Had he time traveled and stopped the events of the breakup form happening? Was this a dream perhaps.

"W-W-What happened?" He looked very perplexed and disgruntled. Amy, understanding instantly what his issue was, smiled. "You had a lot to drink last night, and Leonard and I took you home. "You asked me to sleep here, last night, so I did."

"Im never drinking again." Sheldon said solemly.

He looked at her. Somehow his discomfort ebbed away, noticing they were both clothed. Here was this girl hed been pining over for weeks and weeks and now she was here. He found to his own surprise he was quite relaxed and at ease with her in his bed. In spite of himself he actually liked the idea of her being so comfortable with him. He wasn't sure how to approach the situation, and he couldn't think very hard because it hurt too much.

Amy chuckled as he winced in pain. "Ill get you some aspirn."

"Thank you." Sheldon squinted in the horrible sun once again. He ran a hand over his unshaven jaw and his tosseled hair.

Leonard was making coffee when he did a double take and realized Amy had spent the night in Sheldon's room.

"Amy?" Leonard asked.

"Good Morning Leonard." She said brightly.

"So….are you guys…back to normal?" He asked awkwardly

Amy considered this. "Im not sure. We haven't discussed it. I assume if Sheldon wishes to re-instate our relationship agreement he will draw up the nessesailry documents in due course." She said with a coy smile.

Leonard returned it. For Sheldon's sake he wanted them to get together, and he had to admit, he grown to like Amy.

Sheldon came out of his room squinting and very hung over. He flopped on the stool in the breakfest nook.

"Morning." Leonard said.

Sheldon grunted. Amy placed tea in front of him, which he took without opening his eyes. "Thank You." He muttered

"Youre welcome."

"Mm-hmm." Sheldon grunted not opening his eyes.

Leonard looked at the Darth Vader clock above the microwave. "Youd better hurry up buddy, were gunna be late."

"Ugh….alcohol thy name is Diablo." Sheldon groaned and finished his tea and shuffled into the bathroom to take a shower and get ready.

Amy sipped her coffee in thought. "I have to head to the lab myself, if you like, I can drive him."

"Oh, okay that would be great." Leonard looked at his watch, and knocked on the bathroom door calling "Sheldon, Amys gunna take you to work with her, I gotta go. Ill see ya later."

"Fine….just stop yelling" Sheldon grunted.

Leonard snorted and dashed about grabbing his things and then out the door realizing he was running late himself.

In the silence of the car, Sheldon sat quietly massaging his temple. Amy, every once a while shot a sideways glance at him. While she assumed he was quiet to due to a massive hangover, she wondered what he could be thinking about.

"Amy?" He said finally.

"Yes?"

"Are you going to go out with Stewart again?"

"I don't think so. I believe, if I use the phrase correctly, Stewart is 'hooking up' with an old classmate of mine from high school"

"I see." Sheldon said slowly. "What about my brother?"

"While your brother is charactertiscly attractive sexually and exhudes confidence in classic male fashion, I must admit, my intertal fascination with him was merely a passing fancy. I don't believe your brother possess the nessessialy intellect to engage in relationship I feel would be mutally beneficial to us both. While he is charming, and, I believe - a better man than you happen to give him credit for, I don't think Ill be seeing him again in a romantic nature."

Again there was silence.

Sheldon was quiet for a long time. "Amy?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want to be my girlfriend again?" He said in the most earnest voice shed ever heard from him.

Amy looked over at him at the red light. "Are you proposing we reinstate the relationship agreement?"

"I am." Sheldon said slowly.

"I have some conditions and adendunms."

"Such as?"

"Well for starters, no more hooliganism. Ill not stand to be talked to the way you spoke to me last night."

"No more hooliganism." Sheldon held up his right hand like a boy scout

"All legitimate exclamations of affections shall be demonstrated without influence of any substance, lest they be considered invalid."

Sheldon nodded solemnly. "Agreed. Were not Penny and Leonard." She shuttered at the thought.

"Agreed."

"Anything else?"

She pulled the car over and turned off the engine. "Sheldon, all Im really asking for is for you to take earnest interest in my life and career, for you to want to be around me and not make me feel like it's a chore for you to be near me. I don't think that's an unreasonable request as you make it out to be. Yes, we will have differences of opinion, we like different things, but if we want to make this work as an agreed upon relationship, we also need to comprise with each other and share our feelings as such."

Sheldon looked over at her. "I promise Ill never make you feel like I don't want you ever again. You have my word as a scientist, a justice league member and a star fleet academy graduate."

"Very well." Amy said seriously. "Do you have any addendums?"

"Yes. One." Sheldon leaned in and kissed her deeply . "All Physical displays of affections should be genuine and without pretense." He said with a smoldering sexiness in his voice shed never heard before.

Amy shallowed hard. "Repetition of said displays shall occour when both parties are committed to the aforementioned and therefore incur the obvious ramifications of said displays."

"Agreed." Sheldon leaned in again and they made out some more with vigor.

Amy began to breath heavily. "Any romanticism and emotional behaviors will be deemed mutual upon completion of the notorized agreed upon terms between Dr Sheldon Lee Cooper and Dr Amy Farrah Fowler." The windows began to fog.

"Agreed." They made out like horny teenagers.


	30. Chapter 30

Leonard placed his tray on the lunch table.

"hey…you guys seen Sheldon today?"

"Actaully no, I thought he came to work with you." Howard said smearing mustard on his sandwhich.

"Amy said she would bring him."

Howard smirked. 'Wouldn't it be hilarious if they had make up sex?"

The guys giggled stupidly. "yeah right." Raj chuckled and pretended to be a robot. "Amy….would you like to engage in coiltus?"

"Why yes Dr Cooper I would enjoy that." Howard returned in the same voice

The guys laughed haughty.

"I wonder where he is."

"You check the lab?" Raj asked he could eating down there with Amy.

"Ewww. Gross Dude."

"That's not what I meant!" Raj said affronted and when thinking about it pushed his tray away. So did Leonard and Howard who looked green.

"Ugh….when did this turn into a game of gross out?"

"Oh man! I haven't played that since middle school!"

"Wanna-"

"NO!" Leonard and Howard both said at the same time.

Raj flopped his elbows on the table and out his cheeks in his hand. "You guys never wanna do anything fun." He pouted.

When Leonard got home that night, he found George flipping channels on the couch in Sheldon's spot, and found it irked him somehow. He wasn't even sure why. Perhaps with Sheldon not present, the vaccum concept came into play, and he was forced to take up the position of house nut job. Or, maybe Leonard reasoned, living with Sheldon had actually drove him insane.

"Hey - You seen Sheldon?" Leonard asked

George didn't looked up. "Yeah, Hes in his room with ..uh…whatser' name there… Alice."

"Amy." Leonard corrected. "You just went out her the other night."

"I didn't call her by her name…" He shrugged

Leonard shook his head. He went to the fridge and noticed George had eaten all the leftover Chinese form the previous night. He found this annoyed him too.

When Sheldon came out of his bedroom, his hair was tousled, he had lipstick smeared on his face and he was very flustered to see other people in the apartment.

"Leonard! Your home early." His eyes darted about guiltily

Amy came out with her lipstick smeared, and hair a mess. She walked dignified through the apartment to the door, despite the fact she was deshelved. "Goodnight Dr Cooper. Im glad we could properly notarize those documents."

She left with her usual strange shuffle with as much dignity as she could muster. Sheldon blushed deep red.

Leonard grinned. "Did you go to work today?" He asked playfully knowing the obvious answer.

"We…" Sheldon corrected himself. "I came home early. I…" He cleared his throat dramaticly. "I … uh… Wasn't feeling well."

George smirked and took a swig of his beer. "At-a-boy."


	31. Chapter 31

Sheldon was dreadfully embarrassed. He threw an uncomfortable look at Leonard and then narrowed his eyes at his brother. " . .spot." He gritted his teeth, and his fists balled, and his right eye began to twitch.

"You crazy ol' hound dog!" George chuckled like a frat boy. He looked up at Sheldon finally and realized he was going to pitch a fit or something so he moved his butt over to the left with his eyes rolled.

"Well well well who'd a thunk it?" Leonard smirked. "The great Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper is a ladies man."

"Stop it! This isn't funny! Sheldon said. "That enchantress has bewitched me and she must be stopped! Shes … some kind of succubus sent from hell to devour my soul!" Sheldon couldn't deal with so much change at once. It was beginning to overwhelm him.

George laughed heartily. "Yeah I betchya she devoured your soul all afternoon."

Sheldon scowled.

Leonard looked confused. "Wait didn't you guys get back to together last night?"

'And this afternoon." Sheldon said with a funny little smile on his face, but after he said he clamed his hand over his mouth as if hed uttered a horrible curse word.

Leonard smirked again. "Relax Sheldon." Leonard said knowingly. "Take a deep breath everything is okay. You got Amy back, that's great"

"This is too much to handle…everything is moving too fast."

"Oh Com'on Shelly…" George got up. "Im proud o'ya! " He clapped Sheldon on the shoulder hard causing him to lurch forward. "Let me take ya out for a beer to celebrate my little brother finally gettin' some!"

"I cant take this."

"Wait - wait wait - You guys went all the way?!" Leonard's jaw dropped

Sheldon shuttered at the thought. "NO! Of course not! what do you think I am?"

"A red blooded man whose got a cute girlfriend who he was with all day." George smiled and wiggled his eye brows.

"Whom he was with." Sheldon said automatically. "For heavens sake, if youre going to be obnoxious at least perform proper grammar while doing so" Sheldon said trying to muster any kind of pride he had left.

Leonard took a napkin from the table. "You uh…got a little lipstick on your cheek there…, let me just get that for ya."

Sheldon scowled and threw both guys evil looks. "I hate you guys so much." They both gawfawed. Sheldon wasn't sure what this new feeling was, he hated all the uncertainty. He had no idea what to think about this entire endeavor, and he hated himself for succumbing to his baser instincts. He fancied himself above such things, but here was caught by Leonard and George in the most humiliating way.

"Im takin my brother out for a beer." George said getting to his feet with pride. He grabbed Sheldon and pushed him strongly to the door.

"But … But I don't wanna go." Sheldon protested. He felt himself recoil at the thought.

"Too bad. Were goin" He bodily grabbed the back of Sheldons jacket and pushed him out of the door swinging it shut. "its time we talked."

Leonard stood there completely befuddled at the situation, and shook his head, turning to go his own bedroom.

"Apparently the space/time continuum has been broken…" Leonard said turning for his bedroom.


	32. Chapter 32

At the local bar, George ordered a beer for himself and a glass of milk for Sheldon. "Ok…so you guys just made out. That's okay - that's a good thing."

"Don't you talk to me about this…. Not three nights ago - you were trying to … to…to… manhandle her!"

George rolled his eyes. "Oh com'on Shelly. I was not gunna…" Sheldon gave him a look. "Well yeah I was. Ok fine." He admitted. "But all she could talk about was you!"

"But I liked things the way they were…when they were simple and easy." He said "I …I don't know if I can handle this."

"It's the way it is kid."

"Don't call me kid." He spat .

"Now, don't go getting all huffy at me Shelly. Im tryin to be civil to ya fer once." George said hotly. "So - Let me get this straight – you spent the entire day in your bed room making out with your girlfriend who pretty much is the perfect girl for you, who practicly worships the ground you walk on, and youre like what - mad about this?"

"Don't you of all people understand how hard this is for me to go through?"

George looked at his brother with a hard expression. "You, sir, are .crap."

Sheldon looked up at George surprised. "You act like – oh Im a scientist, nothing must get in the way of my work…blah blah blah…but when it comes right down to it youre just a regular guy just like the rest of us pal. Ive seen you stare at that chicks' parts the same way we all do, so act all high and mighty." He tipped the top of his beer bottle toward Sheldon before taking a swig.

"That's a biological reaction. Ample hind quarters indicate good breading capabilites thus furthering the line." Sheldon tried to sound dignified as best he could. "The 'parts' of Amy I fin attractive are her mind and her personality, not her…her…" He made curvy silhouettes with his hands

"Uh huh – and the dirty magazines in your drawer are for the articles right?"

"Those are Wolowitz's!" Sheldon spat. "I didn't order those!" His cheeks got very pink

"Call it whatever ya want, you like her for the same reason I liked her, and it aint fer her personality." He winked evilly

Sheldons face turned an ugly shade of red. "Do you actually have the audacity to call me a … common …mook?! I am a man of pure science, I do not engage in the common carnal insticnts predicated from animals"

George said folding his arms. "Sheldon there aint nothing wrong with the way you look at that chick, and lord knows we all had our doubts about ya…"He admitted. "Lookit - I know ya don't like when things change, like the time mom changed recipes in her meat loaf and you didn't speak to her for a week….but even you have to admit change can be good. If nothing ever changed, youd still be home in Texas writing yer weird math stuff on the walls of the hallway, like ya did when you were little."

Sheldon snorted. "Im not suggesting that personal growth is bad, but maintaining a static environment has always kept me comfortable in a world I have never really felt like I fit into." He admitted uncomfortably looking straight into the bar.

"No kidding…." George said rolling his eyes, then he gave his brother a serious stare. "Look, I tell ya this. That chick is one for the books. "

"Then why do I feel so ill at ease?"

"Well...Because, you probably have never felt this way about a girl before and it is, a real scary feeling." George said knowingly. "I mean yeah you had that awful thing for Collete, but you were also a little kid. Sooo…"

"Don't you dare bring her into this…." Sheldon scowled.

George sighed heavily tried another approach.

"Ok - Sheldon, do you remember when you left for college?" George said.

"yes, of course I do, I remember everything. I have an edictic memory."

George rolled his eyes. "ok well, Do you remember how many times you called home in tears because you were scared, or lonely, or got beat up?"

Sheldon grimaced. "I was twelve, and away from home for the first time in my life."

"Well, that turned out to be something you really loved remember?"

"I do." Sheldon reluctanlty said. "I was finally in a place with people like myself who truly wanted to learn." He said fondly with a soft smile. "One of my professors, used to buy me ice cream when I sad."

"So, this is just like that."

"I don't expect you to understand." He glared at his brother.

"Whatever. Fine. I don't know what Im talking about right?" He said throwing out his hand in exhasperation. "Im nit going through a messy divorce or anything…I don't know what its like to loose a chick you know ya should have been nicer to."

Sheldon relented. "Im sorry. Youre right. I should heed your advice."

"And You also don't want to loose her again right?." George pointed out. "But now ya cant go back to the way things was…..so whater ya gunna do?"

Sheldon sipped his milk in troubled thought.

George looked at his little brother with pity in his eyes. He paused before speaking. "Sheldon, do you understand why dad started cheatin' on mom?"

"Because she is a evanlical nutcase with no more understanding of the universe than and ant has to a sandbox."

"No. Its because they didn't love each other anymore. Dad didn't treat Mom the way she should have been treated, and neither did mom. Sooner or later that will happen to people who don't put the effort it takes to keep a relationship alive."

"Is that why Collette diverosed you?" He asked innocently.

"Well…" George grunted. "I guess Im just like the old man. Too drunk and too stupid to realize I had a great thing and I screwed it up." George admitted. "Don't make the same mistake with yours." He pointed a finger at Sheldon while holding his beer.

Sheldon looked at the shiney polished bar, and then at his brother. "You know, ... we never talk like this." He said

"We never talk about anything."George replied. "I always figured you don't care – so why should I?"

Sheldon looked at his brother with meaning. "Youre my brother." He stated. "My loyality will always be to my family." He stated. "Dad said brothers are supposed to take bullets for each other."

George sighed heavily and swigged his beer. "Yeah I know you would. " He clapped Sheldon hard on the shoulder making him almost lurch into his milk. "I guess we both got that stubborn Cooper thing in us huh?" He said haughty. "You know he really loved you don't you?"

"Dad?"

"Yeah." George said quietly.

Sheldon and George barely said twenty words to each other about their father. Both men said at the bar in collective silence remembering a man who had in his best been an alcoholic, and at his worst been an abusive redneck.

"I know you miss him. Hed be real proud of you." George said finally looking at his brother. "We all are."

"Im sorry about Colette." He said finally

"Me too. Sorry. I mean …. About….ya know - everything." George rubbed his neck.

"For sitting in my spot?"

"Yeah. Sure."

"For being mean to me all those times?"

George nodded reluctatluy.

"For eating all my yogurt?"

"Uh yeah."

"For trying to steal my girl?"

"She wasn't your girl!"

"She was too."

"Sheldon godammit!"

"Say youre sorry!"

"For Godsake! Now I remember why I never talk to you."

"Apolgoize!"

"I just did!"

"Apologie for trying to dishonor Amy."

George stopped defeated. "Fine. For that I am sorry." He paused "Seriously." He said it looking Sheldon in the eye, and then looking down. "You know, this is why we don't ever call each other..." He paused again. "Wasn't easy when you left ya know."

Sheldon looked up at his brother. "What do you mean? "

"Sheldon, do you have any idea how hard it was for me in that high school when my little brother of eleven years old graduated before me? How many times did I have to hear, there goes Georgey Cooper the dumbass. I got flack all the time because I had to deal with the fact that not only does my little brother not give a damn about me or Missy, but that I was the idiot older brother."

"I never knew that." Sheldon said looking very uncomfortable "Im sorry you had to go through that."

"yeah well, You never asked did you?" George grumbled. "Don't you think I wanted to call you when you away in Germany? Or when you started grad school ? Or when you finished Grad school or got hired at the college?" George said

"Its not in my nature to expound such emotion. It never has been, but I do admit, I wanted to call you and talk to you too." Sheldon said uncharatersicly placing his hand on his brothers shoulder. After a long pause he said: "Im sorry I wasn't around."

George smiled softly. "Wow. A Genuine Sheldon Lee Cooper apology."

After a long pause of male bonding, both men cleared their throats and turned away


End file.
